Quick Movie Review: Snow Day (2000)

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Originally intended to be a feature film version of the Nickelodeon show, The Adventures of Pete & Pete, Snow Day has its roots buried well.

Living in California, we never had snow days, but I was luckily able to live vicariously through this movie.

Snow Day follows a group of young kids who celebrate the year’s first school closure and try to stop the “evil” snow-plowman (Chris Elliott) from clearing the roads. Meanwhile, high schooler Hal (Mark Webber) tries to woo the popular Claire Bonner (Emmanuelle Chriqui) after she breaks up with her boyfriend. The film’s moniker is that anything can happen on a snow day.

Just like Pete & Pete, it’s way smarter than it needs to be or should be. Much like childhood, it’s often bittersweet. It glorifies the simple things because that’s what it’s like when we’re kids. These little pleasures are such a big deal to us, and it’s nice to see a movie that understands that.

For a children’s movie it’s fully aware of itself and stays entertaining throughout without having to throw in any cheap action sequences.

Though it’s still a product of its time, so it’s not without a couple of sappy moments–only one or two.

Hal’s dad is played by Chevy Chase, who’s a perfect fit. And Josh Peck is a wonder here in his debut. It’s apparent early on that he has great instincts. The cast is very good all around with some solid performances that really get the job done. There really aren’t any weaknesses.

Hal’s sister, Natalie, is the ring leader of the anti-plowman kids. A lesser film would have found cliches to fill out her relationship with her brother, but this one knows how to hit the nail perfectly on the head.

This movie just gets it, embellishing small moments and memories as we do in our minds when we’re young, and keeping them that way even into adulthood, so we can look back at them the best way possible. Snow Day basically magnifies that sentiment and perfectly empathizes with it by making the mundane magical.

Twizard Rating: 92

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Quick Movie Review: Kenan & Kel – Two Heads Are Better Than None (2000)

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Often times, longer episodes–or specials–of a half-hour sitcom series don’t work. The pacing is all thrown off and the lack of a laugh track makes the jokes fall flat.

And while Two Heads Are Better Than None is a little odd at first without the studio audience, any fan of Kenan and Kel will enjoy this made-for-TV movie. It’s the same humor, minus the scheming by Kenan.

This one lets the boys get into trouble all without having to scheme anything at all. Kel crashes Kenan’s family’s cross-country road trip vacation. Along the way, they encounter the ghost of a headless knight who is looking for a living soul to give him a new head.

The details tend to get a little foggy, but it’s not a far cry from the usual flippancy of the half-hour episodes. Continue reading

Quick Movie Review: Cry Baby Lane (2000)

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Nickelodeon’s Cry Baby Lane has somewhat of a mystique surrounding it. On October 28, 2000, Nick aired the made-for-TV movie. But after that, it was never aired again. Apparently the film got banned. Years later, talks of it swirled around the undercurrents of the internet, and finally, in 2011, the movie was shown on Nickelodeon’s TeenNick network.

Why was it banned you ask? Well for starters, the film starts out with Frank Langella’s character, Mr. Bennett the undertaker, telling the tale of a farmer and his wife who gave birth to conjoined twins many years ago. Ashamed of his children, the farmer kept the them locked up in a room in his house. He soon realized that one twin was good, while the other was evil. Eventually one of them got sick and died, which was also fatal to the other twin since they shared the same vital organs. After they died, the farmer sawed the two boys in half, burying the good twin in the town cemetery, while burying the evil twin at the end of a generic dirt road in the backwoods. The road is now called Cry Baby Lane due to the sounds you hear in the middle of the night of the dead boy crying for his twin brother.

Yeah, this film was banned. In the year 2000. Can you imagine what the reaction would have been like if it were released nowadays when parents are far more aware of what their kids watch? It’s a very creepy movie, and doesn’t even saturate itself with jump-scares. All of the creepiness comes from the inherent properties of the story and the visuals themselves. But I think we may not be giving kids the credit they deserve. I think they can handle it.

The eerie tale of the twin boys is being told to brothers, Andrew and Carl. Andrew is played by Jase Blankfort, and he does a great job. His deliveries are so spot-on and organic that you never sense he’s acting. He’s fun to watch. The free-flowing dialogue helps his true instincts come out and he really gets a chance to show his chops.

I would’ve loved if this could have been longer. At 70 minutes, it’s an unusually short film, so the pacing is all out-of-sorts. Maybe that’s why it feels just like a really long TV episode.

Although never formally advertised as such, Cry Baby Lane is a feature-length version of the Nickelodeon show Are You Afraid of the Dark? With most references to the show coming from motifs in the musical score, the film does actually follow a similar tone–albeit much darker.

The loose direction by Peter Lauer crosses back and forth between refreshingly unorthodox and frustratingly informal. It’s a weird movie with a lot of seemingly unrelated bits added in, making the film feel disjointed at times. There are scenes and characters that do nothing but waste time, even with the little amount it has in the first place.

But on the other hand he doesn’t let simple details go unnoticed merely because this is a kids’ movie. He has characters in the film who are possessed, but doesn’t just cliche his way through it. He uses these instances as opportunities for humor and irony. At one point, a possessed mailman goes around smashing mailboxes with a baseball bat. Many of the seemingly-innocuous idiosyncrasies or nuances are given attention–for better or for worse.

There’s a sort of unique humor to the film. Most of it is subtle–another very “Nickelodeon” thing about it. In fact, many of the events happen primarily due to the fact that Mr. Bennett is the world’s worst undertaker–a joke exemplified a few times.

Needless to say, you don’t have to worry about this movie talking down to its audience. The subject matter alone proves that it has every bit of faith that kids can handle just about anything. I’d say Cry Baby Lane might possibly be a little too mature and scary for some kids to be watching, but rooted in its reckless storyline are ideals and philosophies of past children’s TV networking. Things that are no longer practiced in children’s television really at all. Things that used to let kids know you trusted them and didn’t think they were stupid. This might be the most important takeaway of all.

Twizard Rating: 86

Ranking Every ‘Boy Meets World’ Episode Ever!

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Boy Meets World is a show that each fan grew up on differently. Some caught it during its original TGIF Friday Night Lineup. Others saw it for the first time on Disney Channel in the early ’00s during its 2nd run syndication. I even know some people that literally only know the show for its college seasons. But this discrepancy is the reason why the show is beloved by fans of a wide age range. It’s just as relatable now as it was back then. And unlike a lot of ’90s sitcoms, the humor holds up incredibly well.

Just like I did with Even Stevens, I’ve ranked each episode based on a variety of factors, including, but not limited to, humor, series importance, re-watch value, character development and overall writing. And I’m sorry in advance if I offend any of you by my choices. I had a hard time, myself, not putting certain episodes higher up. There are episodes I love that aren’t even ranked in the top 50. That’s how good this show is.

As you will see, I have many of the 6th and 7th season episodes farther down on the list. It’s not because they’re all bad episodes–they just don’t have the same quality as the earlier seasons and I had to make an executive decision. While the 2nd season is my favorite, I’ve found that the 3rd season is the show’s true sweet spot. The characters were all in their prime–and they weren’t too old or too young.

(By the way, after you read this list, go and check out my list of the best Boy Meets World one-off characters!)

I’m not gonna lie, this process took a lot out of me. It was fun, but I obsessively and painstakingly went over and over this list until I felt it was absolutely perfect. I watched the series in order and compiled a list as I went. Then I took my own list and watched it in reverse order. Some episodes I re-watched 3 or 4 times for this–constantly going back and forth, making changes right before publishing. But I didn’t post this until I was completely happy with it. And I am.

At the end of my list, I have an MVP winner for each season. It goes to the character or characters who hold that season together the best. In seasons 2-4, I have more than one since I feel it’s a group effort.

So, without further ado, I give you my ranking of every Boy Meets World episode ever:

157. 702 For Love and Apartments, Part 2

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This episode is the worst. It’s so asinine and incredibly hard to watch. Cory and Shawn go to Pittsburgh to try and get Topanga’s parents back together. That’s already marginal at best. But the stupidest part is that Jack and Eric have a WWF-style wrestling match with the girls to get their old apartment back–something that should have never happened to begin with. The episode is really just terrible. Even Eric can’t save this one.
Favorite Line:
Eric: That is one big freakin’ picture of the Backstreet Boys!

156. 505 The Witches of Pennbrook

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In this Halloween-themed episode, Jack starts dating a witch in the form of Candace Cameron. It should be a better episode than it is. Instead, it’s more frustrating that Jack is such an idiot. Meanwhile, we get a Cory and Topanga subplot that never gets resolved. Fantastic.
Favorite Line:
Millie: Hi.
Eric: Hi, I’m Eric Allison Matthews.

155. 221 The Thrilla in Phila

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In the silliest episode of the season and maybe the series, Cory joins the wrestling team because he feels like he hasn’t accomplished much this school year. It’s the first episode featuring Frankie’s dad, Vader, and one of a few episodes where the writers are stuck with Cory amidst his awkward voice-cracking puberty phase. It’s like they’re not quite sure how to handle it, but luckily it doesn’t last long.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Feeny: This is why I avoid reunions.

154. 609 Poetic License – An Ode to Holden Caulfield

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Perhaps the worst part of the sixth season, besides the sudden absence of Feeny, is how serious Shawn becomes. It’s like, all of a sudden the writers woke up and told him to become this brooding, angst-filled college guy. In previous seasons, he had his moments where he was emo, but he was balanced out with his humor and silliness/stupidity. Now he’s no nonsense and not that much fun. It’s painful to watch. This episode might be most evident of this. We discover that, all these years, Shawn is a brilliant poet. With this new information, Cory forces Shawn to perform at a poetry night. He reads a poem that’s about Angela, but pretends that it was written before they broke up. The only highlights come from the Eric storyline and the few instances where Cory is reading his own “poetry”.
Favorite Line:
Eric: That’s what I call the “Eric Matthews Fool-Proof Study System.” Hello. I’m Eric Matthews.

153. 606 Hogs and Kisses

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For some reason this episode’s always bothered me. It’s funny and all, but maybe it’s the fact that Topanga kisses Shawn without any hesitation. Or maybe because the kiss lasts so long. Or maybe because we’ve always sensed that Shawn has been attracted to Topanga at various moments and now he finally gets a “free shot”. Or maybe because neither Topanga nor Shawn outwardly denied that there was any tension. The series takes a risk being more progressive with this episode, but it’s more cringe-worthy than anything else. If the circumstances went down a little differently, then maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Underpants!

152. 708 The Honeymooners

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Cory and Topanga go on their honeymoon to “paradise” and decide that they might want to stay there forever. It’s an uneventful episode, and not even very funny at all. The line Cory delivers at the end may be the corniest in the entire series.
Favorite Line:
Eric: I am losing my train of thought. I have decided to pass out.

151. 719 Brotherly Shove

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It’s the last chance the writers had to make an episode about Cory and Eric’s relationship. But at a time in the series when Eric is pretty much mentally-disabled, it’s hard to imagine him being serious–even mad. People mistreat him all the time, but he chooses NOW to get upset about something. Cory is cleaning out his parents’ garage with Topanga and Shawn, but Eric gets hurt that he doesn’t get invited to join his brother. Eric and Cory are fighting the whole episode. It’s tough when your comic relief is so uncharacteristically serious. Then there are all these awkward transitions between goofy Eric and serious Eric. But he’s coming from a place we can understand. Cory is uncharacteristically dense and can’t see where his brother is coming form. And nobody helps him figure it out until it’s too late. It would have been a nice episode for a previous season, but just doesn’t work as well at this point in the series.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: You know, Jack, Eric said something interesting before that got me thinking.
Jack: Wait a minute, Eric got you thinking?
Shawn: He seemed well-rested.

150. 113 She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not

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Eric speaks to Cory’s 6th grade class about what to expect in high school, but does a poor job. The writers have their first jab at making an episode developing Eric’s character, but with little success. Not a whole lot happens and they never fully commit. It’s a good thing they didn’t give up on this idea because it pays off in later seasons.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Oh yeah, I’m jealous. That’s just what I want–to be Topanga’s boyfriend. And then we can name our children Chewbacca and Plankton.

149. 418 Uncle Daddy

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Eric dates a girl who has a son and wants to commit to the relationship full-time. However, he soon realizes how hard it is to be a father–even temporarily. The few cringe-worthy moments aren’t really worth the end result. The episode is mostly about Eric, but he’s not at his funniest so the laughs aren’t really there either.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Eric, listen, you do not wanna miss this one, okay? It’s Jim Carrey and Steven Seagal starring in “What Are You Doing in My Movie?”

148. 608 You’re Married, You’re Dead

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The single guys that Shawn hangs out with keep making fun of Cory for wearing an engagement ring. So one night, Cory takes it off. Does he put it in his pocket? No. He leaves it on the table at the restaurant. It’s a funny episode, but Shawn, so far, in this season is far too emo. And he seems to be getting annoyed with Cory every single chance he gets. Like, REALLY annoyed. Jack is like this with Eric, but it works so much better because you still see the love for one another. And Jack’s not emo.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Before you say anything, I just wanna state, that as a man I am entitled to certain rights and privileges. So as a man, I went with other men and did man things because I do not want to be thought of by those men as–how to I put this delicately…
Topanga: Whipped??
Cory: You could at least let me say it!

147. 704 No Such Thing as a Sure Thing

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Wow. I’m glad the Cory/Topanga drama is finally over with so we can move on to something better. This episode is pretty dry, with the exception of a funny Eric-Feeny scene. When the star player on Pennbrook’s football team is struggling in school, Eric and Jack are convinced that they will come out ahead if they bet against their own team. Also, Cory and Topanga get back together.
Favorite Line:
Jack: He’ll understand that while he’s looking at our thumbs in a jar.
Eric: He has a thumb jar?? That seems odd.

146. 511 A Very Topanga Christmas

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Topanga is pretty annoying in this episode. She’s spending Christmas with the Matthews, yet insists that they abandon all of their holiday traditions for her own–including making them drive all the way to Vermont to chop down a Christmas tree. There are some great messages about compromise and learning new things about a person, but they get muddled amongst the unrealistic scenarios that take place.
Favorite Line:
Eric: This is about the power struggle between men and women since the creation of man over 300 years ago!

145. 514 Heartbreak Cory

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I don’t like this episode. Nobody does. Sure Topanga can be the absolute worst sometimes, but we all know she and Cory are meant for each other. Cory and the rest of his classmates spend the weekend at a ski lodge. When Cory breaks his ankle (or something), Topanga and everyone else goes skiing without him. He meets Lauren, a girl who works at the ski lodge, and they stay up all night talking, and at the end of it, she kisses him. He lies to Topanga about the whole thing. It’s probably the biggest turning point in the whole series and makes the next handful of episodes more difficult to endure. The episode isn’t really all that funny either–except for a couple of Shawn moments. Well-written, but just extremely hard to watch.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: Read the Bible!

144. 114 The B-Team of Life

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This one tackles middle-child-syndrome as Cory’s family seems to be ignoring him amidst his crisis of making second string on the basketball team–which means he never plays. While things could be more tragic (and more realistic), there are a few good scenes with Eric.
Favorite line:
Eric: The whole world doesn’t revolve around you, Cory.
Cory: I’m starting to get that feeling.

143. 407 Singled Out

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It’s a very strange episode. Eric goes on the actual MTV game show, Singled Out, to meet college girls, meanwhile Cory goes into surgery to get his tonsils removed. The episode is probably the most different of any up to this point. You almost feel like you’re watching an entirely different show. And it doesn’t really seem to serve much purpose either.
Favorite Line:
MTV Lady: College?
Eric: Harvard.
MTV Lady: Harvard?
Eric: Yeah! Gooooo Smart Guys!

142. 518 If You Can’t Be With The One You Love…

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It’s the alcohol episode. Cory gets drunk at a party and gets Shawn to drink as well. And as Cory decides he never wants to drink again, Shawn likes the feeling a little too much. But in the end, Shawn “recovers”. Most people who have experienced someone with this disease know it’s not that easy of a fix. There’s usually a lot more of struggle. This episode wasn’t shown when the show aired on the Disney Channel, but kids didn’t miss out on much. It’s not all that funny, and it’s more corny than anything else. But Amy possibly delivers her best line of the series.
Favorite Line:
Cory: I wouldn’t drink and drive. I’m not a moron.
Mrs. Matthews: You peed on a cop car!

141. 409 Sixteen Candles and Four-Hundred-Pound Men

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Cory has to be two places at once. He has Topanga’s Sweet Sixteen party, but also has to be at Frankie’s dad’s professional wrestling match to give him tips so that Frankie can get closer with his dad. So Cory and Shawn have to run back and forth between events to fool everyone. It’s an extremely silly episode–and so is professional wrestling–but at least it acknowledges it it once or twice. Though not nearly enough. The main plot hole? The wrestling match is on the TV at Topanga’s party. Cory could have given tips to Shawn who could have, in turn, run back and forth between the match and the party. Also, there aren’t a heck of a lot of jokes, but at least we get to see Frankie and his dad.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Yeah, but you see, Shawn, that was a cartoon. Time was compressed. We’re real. We’re in real time.
Shawn: Trust men, it’s the same thing.
Cory: No, it’s not. You see, a television show can cover many days in only one half-an-hour program.
Shawn: Trust me, it’s the same thing.

140. 713 The Provider

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Topanga used to be really sweet and thoughtful. In this episode, she’s all of a sudden not understanding at all about Cory. She’s oblivious and annoying. Cory gets a job selling magazine subscriptions over the phone. Topanga gets a better job and pretty much rubs it in Cory’s face the whole time. But somehow, even though they’ve been “dating since they were 2,” she can’t figure out what’s troubling him. It should be more meaningful, but Topanga’s behavior leading up to it sort of ruins it. The episode’s not a complete wash though. The scene when Cory’s trying to sell magazines is pretty entertaining.
Favorite Line:
Cory: I’m gonna read you our list of magazines. Now, there’s over 700 here, so please don’t hang up before I finish because I don’t like it and it’s mean to me.

139. 603 Ain’t College Great

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Cory realizes that he may not be as prepared for college as he thought he was. He fails at signing up for the right classes his first week. Rather, he enrolls in quantum physics and organic chemistry. It’s a realistic episode about the struggles of the transition between high school and college, and the fact that no one is ever truly prepared enough. Although, it’s annoying that everyone is treating Cory like an incompetent moron.
Favorite Line:
Cory: It’s new and exciting, just like me! So nuts to you, you jerks!

138. 610 And In Case I Don’t See Ya

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You’ll either love this episode or hate it. Eric does his own take on The Truman Show, where he sets up a camera in his apartment in order to become more popular, but all anyone wants to watch is Rachel. He quickly becomes manipulative, controlling everything in the apartment to torture his female roommate. The episode is  surrealistic and fairly entertaining, although it doesn’t quite fit in with the show. Lo and behold, it’s only a hint of what’s to come for future episodes. I for one, appreciate its uniqueness. But I mostly like the scenes with Cory and Shawn back to their silly camaraderie again. Their subplot takes place back in the classroom with Feeny–which may have been better suited as the main storyline.
Favorite Line:
Cory: You can’t punish us, we’re in college now.
Alan: Oh yeah? How about if I hit you so hard you’re both back in high school?

137. 714 I’m Gonna Be Like You, Dad

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While this episode is ludicrous–equipped with an old guy who thinks he’s Sammy Sosa–it falls perfectly in line with Cory’s character development. He gets diagnosed with hypochondria. It’s frustrating that everyone treats him like a psychopath–including his own wife. But his ailment serves for the butt of some good jokes. Meanwhile, Alan hires Eric at the store to protect him from the real world of having to find a job. The episode is funny, but the characters in it are frustrating.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: Placebos are what they give to crazy people like you to make them think they’re being cured of something they don’t have.
Cory: Hey! I have to be on these for the rest of my LIFE!!!!

136. 419 Quiz Show

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After Cory, Shawn, and Topanga wind up being contestants on the syndicated “Pop Quiz” television show, the producers decide to abandon their prestigious and intelligent outfit for a more “hip” vibe. The kids learn lessons about what kind of knowledge is actually valuable in life. The episode speaks on this theme, while seeming to belittle trivial information. It eventually gets away from itself and becomes silly and over-the-top just to prove a point.
Favorite Line:
Producer: We’re gonna go on location in Oahu.
Shawn: Columbus, Oahu??

135. 211 The Beard

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Shawn asks Cory to date a girl just to keep her off the market until Shawn’s ready for her. But when Cory ends up having feelings for the girl, he proves not to be as safe as Shawn expects. It’s a decently funny episode, but the way all the characters handle their issues is a little too convenient for the sake of moving the plot along.
Favorite Line:
Stacey: How about a romantic foreign film?
Shawn: Oh please. They don’t even try to speak English in those movies!

134. 109 Class Pre-Union

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This one’s always bothered me a little, in a way. When Cory plans to be a major league baseball player for his mock high school reunion, Feeny gives him an “incomplete” for the assignment on the grounds that his $6 million a year contract wouldn’t be enough in the year 2020. He crushes Cory’s big dreams all because, well, Cory has a big dream. It’s a low point for Mr. Feeny in the series. As someone who’s had my own dreams dismissed by many, this is disconcerting. It’s okay for a teacher to want to prepare his student for potential failings, but not to discourage him altogether, telling him that he’s stupid for having big goals. While this is one of the few times Feeny is wrong, it does shine a nice light on Cory’s dad, who encourages his dream and even contacts major league baseball player, Jim Abbott, to come to their house and talk to his son. That’s enough to get me misty-eyed.
Favorite line:
Shawn: My dad’s fat, my uncle’s fat, my grandpa’s fat. Let’s face it, Cory, I’m gonna be fat.

133. 622 State of the Unions

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Normally season finales are supposed to end somewhere substantial, but this one leaves us with almost everything unresolved–not just one or two story lines, but everything. Even the ones that don’t need to be are still unresolved. With Mr. Feeny getting married to the Dean, Topanga finds out that her parents are getting divorced. It has its moments and sets the tone for the final season, but it’s just not the season finale that we’d hope for.
Favorite Line:
Amy: Actually, it’s time to feed the baby. Alan, why don’t you come help me feed the baby.
Alan: How can I help you feed–
Amy: Alan!

132. 716 Seven the Hard Way, Part 2

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The Plays With Squirrels scene seems to represent this whole episode, but truth be told, the rest of it’s not all that good. It has some nice moments and a meaningful message, but it’s uneventful. After everyone’s deep rooted issues come out and the gang starts fighting with each other, Eric and Feeny try to get them to make up. There ends up being a flash forward seven years later when they’re all grown up and they get to see what they would each lose out on. But it’s unclear who’s having the vision and how it even comes about. Also, some of the deep-rooted issues don’t ever get resolved, and the ones that do aren’t done so convincingly enough. The episode is vastly overrated, except for Plays With Squirrels.
Favorite Line:
Plays With Squirrels: Lose one friend, lose all friends, lose yourself.

131. 701 Show Me the Love, Part 1

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After her parents decide to get divorced, Topanga no longer wants to get married. Not only that, she no longer wants to be with Cory anymore. It’s all very frustrating, and if it wasn’t for Eric’s genius, the episode would just be a flop. However, Eric is at his best.
Favorite Line:
Rachel: Wait a second, what are you gonna do when your hair grows back??
Eric: Psh, it’s not gonna grow back…I got my receipt!

130. 216 Danger Boy

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When everyone thinks Cory and Mr. Feeny are soft, they prove they’re dangerous by riding the deadliest roller coaster on Earth. It’s a funny episode, but the last 5 minutes are silly. This show is above that.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: She’s imported. From New York. The Windy City.

129. 621 The Psychotic Episode

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Like most episodes in the 6th season, the quality of humor is top notch, but some of the plots start getting a little thin–or strange. In this one, Cory is having a recurring dream that he kills Shawn. It’s filled with plot holes galore, but I suppose these types of episode are still better than an entire season of Shawn trying to find himself.
Favorite Line:
Cory: I wish peace for all the little niños.

128. 506 No Guts, No Cory

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A time warp episode to the 1940s finds the whole cast contributing to World War II. It’s emphasis is on Cory and Topanga and their first real conversation about getting married. Cory goes off to fight in the war and leaves Topanga behind, proposing to her before he leaves. I’m not exactly sure what the point of the episode is. Perhaps to prove that if the show took place in the ’40s, Cory and Topanga would be married already. I dunno. But it’s a fairly funny episode, with Eric’s role being a standout.
Favorite Line:
Eric: As brother of the groom, I’m pretty sure I’m ordained to perform the wedding ceremony.

127. 319 I Was a Teenage Spy

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An electrical shock sends Cory back to 1957 amidst the US/Russian Space Race where he adopts the alias Brad Pittser. Everyone from his world is there, with the addition of some Happy Days cast members, such as Anson Williams, Tom Bosley, and Pat Morita. It’s awesome seeing Cory as a fish-out-of-water during a time of less frills. It’s also one of the corniest episodes in the series, keeping it from climbing any higher on the list–a shame, since it has great potential.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Turner: Alright! Who said that?! Who said…utt-bay??
Shawnzie Hunterelli: I did, Mr. Turner. I said “butt”!

126. 711 What A Drag!

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In this episode, Eric and Jack dress up like women to get back at a criminal who’s trying to kill them. It has tendencies to be funny, but has a few plot holes too. Cory is great as he tries to redecorate his and Topanga’s apartment in ugliness.
Favorite Line:
Cory: This is a cork coffee table! Do you realize the money we’re gonna save on coasters?!
Topanga: What if I want coasters??
Cory: Got ’em anyway!!

125. 408 Dangerous Secret

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This is the epitome of a “very special episode.” Here, Cory discovers a girl sleeping over at Shawn’s house and assumes the wrong thing. In turn, it affects his relationship with Topanga. Besides the couple of frustrating plot holes, it’s a pretty good episode. But it also feels a bit too serious at times. Where it can have levity is where it’s the strongest.
Favorite Line:
[Cory puts on music]
Topanga: It’s really pretty. What is it?
Cory: I don’t know. It came with my mom’s Volvo.

124. 212 Turnaround

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An unpopular girl asks Cory to the turnaround dance. So he and Shawn fix her up to become popular. It gets points for introducing us to the International Women’s Network. The episode is entertaining, but it’s just that the jokes mostly fall a little flat.
Favorite Line:
Cory: No! Keep your pity cheek kiss!

123. 102 On the Fence

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The messages are subtle here, as they are for much of the first season. Cory wants to buy a water gun and gets a job painting Mr. Feeny’s shutters. It’s about being a kid and not rushing to grow up. It’s a mediocre episode, but Alan is too good in this one.
Favorite line:
Cory: If they can’t afford to buy toys for three children, why did they have three children?

122. 718 How Cory and Topanga Got Their Groove Back

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Cory and Topanga’s friends stop inviting them to go out with them because they deem them as boring. So the married couple throws a party at their apartment, which nobody goes to. Meanwhile, Eric hits his head and can now see the future. Both story lines are entertaining and funny, but perhaps only amidst an otherwise below-par season.
Favorite Line:
Eric: You know something, Jack? You take all the fun out of sneezing!

121. 620 The Truth About Honesty

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It’s a really funny episode, but it’s almost all pointless. Cory and Topanga make a pact to be 100% honest with each other until it starts to backfire. It’s farcical, but nothing much gets accomplished other than some unnecessary drama between Cory and Topanga.
Favorite Line:
Dana: Aww, who’s the little one?
Eric: That’s Joshua.
Dana: He’s so cute. How old is he?
Eric: Months or somethin’, I dunno.

120. 116 Risky Business

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When Cory and Shawn realize that although using their allowance to bet on racehorses may make them more profitable, it also makes them more confident to risk what they can’t afford to lose. It’s not a big episode, but it has its moments. The ending is a classic and shows Feeny in a unique light.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Feeny: Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words can never hurt you. I made that up.

119. 607 Everybody Loves Stuart

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Fred Savage guest stars in one of the creepiest roles in the series. He plays Stuart, the gang’s new college professor. But one day, he comes on to Topanga and doesn’t leave her dorm room when she asks him to. Later, Cory shoves him to the ground and now Cory is on trial for expulsion from college. It’s a solid episode, and brings Feeny back to the forefront of the season–which is lacking him greatly up until this point.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Look, Mom, Dad, you know about my fifth sense, right?

118. 712 Family Trees

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There’s a lot of discomfort in this episode, but there’s also a lot of genuine sentiment. Shawn discovers that Virna isn’t really his mother. He completely loses it, arriving drunk at Alan’s birthday party. The Matthews offer to adopt him, but he doesn’t want it quite yet. It’s a great episode about Shawn and Cory’s camaraderie and it’s well written. We haven’t seen one about the two of them in awhile.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Okay, listen up people. Here’s the plan as i see it. We give Morgan, who will be our decoy, some kind of poison that’ll make her ill. Dad will hafta take her to the hospital. And when he’s in the emergency room, that’s when the party begins!

117. 316 Stormy Weather

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Eric gets a job as a weatherman at his internship, but drops out of school to give his new career 100%. Now there’s friction between him and his dad. It’s the biggest episode so far for Eric and adds to the list of his screw-ups. There are a few holes, and hardcore fans of the series may be frustrated with the fact that Eric’s future as a weatherman never pans out–or even gets revisited. Cory’s near-absence from this episode makes it a little weak–a common denominator among the episodes that don’t surround him.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Come on, little bro, you can walk, can’t ya?
Cory: In this blizzard? Oh sure, I’ll just trudge all the way to school, freeze my butt off, and walk through life buttless.
Eric: Good deal!

116. 703 Angela’s Men

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This episode has some good moments. Angela admits that she loves Shawn, and Eric plans to sneak attack Topanga–which is a funny bit throughout the episode. But overall, as an audience, we’re still frustrated with Topanga. Her character is turning into someone we don’t really like all that much. However, the credits scene consists of a pretty entertaining blooper real, which we don’t really get in the series.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Eric Matthews will not be beaten up by a woman! Not yet!

115. 605 Better Than the Average Cory

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Cory fears that he’s lived an average life and isn’t good at anything (maybe someone should remind him that he’s good at making movies). We understand where he’s coming from, but his issues never really get resolved and he ends up just getting scoffed at by those around him.
Favorite Line:
Cory: I could’ve one of the greatest ukulele players in the world!

114. 107 Grandma Was a Rolling Stone

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Rue McClanahan guest stars as Cory’s grandmother, and it’s a shame this is the only episode that features her character. She brings a lively energy to the show and the friction between her and Mr. Feeny would have been one for the ages. Either way, we’re glad we get at least one good one with her in it.
Favorite line:
Feeny: Who is that woman?
Cory: My grandma. Don’t you just love her?
Feeny: No. No, I don’t.

113. 706 They’re Killing Us

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Luckily, they wrapped up the entire wedding planning into one episode instead of painfully turning it into a half-season story arc. This one has some funny scenes, mostly stemming from Eric’s ridiculousness, and is kept moving along by intermittent documentary-style interview footage. However, much of it may be boring for the casual viewer unfamiliar with the characters’ histories. The most interesting issue is Cory choosing between Eric and Shawn for his best man.
Favorite Line:
Topanga: We’ve heard wonderful things about you, Ms. Haberfeld.
Judy Haberfeld: Aww, please call me Judy Haberfeld.

112. 315 The Heart is a Lonely Hunter

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Shawn falls for a nice girl, Dana, but she won’t go out with him because of his bad boy reputation. There’s not a lot of basis for him to like her that much, but he does anyway. It’s one of many times where Shawn must relearn his lesson about misunderstanding girls. Meanwhile, Eric gets an internship at a news station.
Shawn: If I’m late for class, fall asleep without me.

111. 515 First Girlfriends Club

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Topanga reads the letter that Lauren wrote Cory on the ski trip and finds out that they kissed. Their relationship is in limbo at the moment as Topanga needs time to clear her head. Meanwhile, a bunch of Shawn’s ex-girlfriends kidnap him in order to prove to Angela that he can’t commit to her. He realizes that he loves Angela and that he would never want to hurt her. Shawn’s finally changing his ways after talking about it all those years. His performance is so great in this episode, but the lack of really anything else going on keeps the episode marginal. The Cory-Topanga ordeal is just hard to watch. And you hope the show isn’t becoming too soapy.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Love doesn’t require you to be perfect, but it does require you to forgive.

110. 401 You Can Go Home Again

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As far as season premiers go, this one isn’t necessarily the best. It’s heartfelt, but the jokes in the first half almost always fall flat. Eric and Cory are finishing up their road trip and get within 3 hours of home when Eric comes to the conclusion that he’s not going to go the rest of the way. Instead, he’s going to settle in rural Pennsylvania. Eric may be at his most annoying in this episode, but Alan comes through and makes the episode good. The highlights come after we meet some salt-of-the-earth-type people and Cory attempts to hitchhike home.
Favorite Line:
Amish Farmer: I’m going as far as…that farm house, there.

109. 103 Father Knows Less

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When Cory’s dad wakes him up in the middle of a school night to watch a baseball game on TV, he falls asleep during his test the next day. Although Mr. Feeny won’t allow a make-up exam, he heads into a deep conversation with Cory about a time when he was younger and his dad wouldn’t let him stay up with him to hear the president announce the end of the war–although Cory larks in every chance he gets, often ruining the moment. But this episode ends on a sort of sad note. We realize Mr. Feeny’s longing for children–and so does he.
Favorite line:
Cory to Mr. Feeny: It’s hard to picture you as a boy. Did your parents call you “Mr. Feeny”?

108. 105 Killer Bees

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Cory wants to compete in the Regional Geography Bee because the winner gets to be bat boy for the World Series, but Mr. Feeny doesn’t have a lot of faith in him due to the fact that he’s a C-average student. The episode is fairly funny, but it’s ones like these that really weigh down the first season in comparison to the later ones. However, I like how here, it’s Feeny who’s proven wrong. And there’s a nice final moment between Cory and Feeny that makes it all worth it.
Favorite line:
Minkus: Nothing against Cindy Crawford, but I’m more of a Connie Chung kinda guy.

107. 206 Who’s Afraid of Cory Wolf

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Puberty is masked as turning into a werewolf in this Halloween-themed episode. Cory is convinced that he’s becoming a fanged beast and it’s driving him insane. Phyllis Diller cameos as a fortune teller and Shawn is hilariously seen dressing up as Cory for Halloween. This one has some funny bits, but overall merely serves as a Halloween episode–albeit a pretty good one.
Favorite Line:
Cory: A wolf? Out here in the ‘burbs?
Mr. Feeny: Yes. Probably looking for better schools.

106. 619 Bee True

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When Dean Bollander’s ex-husband tries to win her back, the gang makes a plan to get her and Feeny together. This episode can get really silly, but it has some really laughable moments, and a nice ending.
Favorite Line:
Eric: I am ashamed to call you guys my brother and Shawn.

105. 709 The Honeymoon is Over

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This is a very real episode about the struggles of being married and on your own. Cory and Topanga realize that they have nowhere to live–mostly because Eric and Jack screw them over. No one will help. Their parents won’t give them a place to live–which is understandable. But they also don’t meet them half way and offer them any sort of advice. But in the end, it’s nice to see that this all brings Cory and Topanga closer.
Favorite Line:
Topanga: Our water’s brown.
Cory: And you hafta chew it.

104. 306 This Little Piggy

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In the first silly episode of the series, Shawn finds a pig at the trailer park and takes it home. Topanga, being slightly irritating, demands that he turn in the pig to animal control. Cory is caught between his best friend and his girlfriend and doesn’t know how to handle it. Meanwhile, Eric tries to convince Mr. Feeny to use his position to get him into Yale. This one establishes Shawn and Topanga’s friendship for the first time. Richard Karn makes an awesome cameo as well.
Favorite Line:
Cory: I am just a big fat stupid head.

103. 101 Pilot

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The very first episode sets the tone nicely for the rest of the series. While many shows have pilots that are much different from the rest of the episodes, this one isn’t far off. Cory’s first lesson is about love and its importance in the world. It establishes a great deal of depth with its characters in just one episode, along with Cory’s respect for Mr. Feeny. It never even borders on cheesy like the occasional episode may do, but it isn’t without its plot holes either. It’s funny, but earnest. And Ben Savage exudes so much confidence in his role as Cory.
Favorite line:
Mr. Feeny: There is no greater aspiration than to have love in our lives, Mr. Matthews…And those who don’t know it will sit in detention for the rest of their lives.

102. 710 Pickett Fences

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It’s crazy which episodes mean more to you as you get older. You relate to them differently. Whereas, when you were a kid watching the show, they meant very little to you. In this one, Cory and Topanga still struggle with their living situation and attempt to buy a house, hoping their parents will help. When their parents refuse to, Cory and Topanga get bitter and decide to show them that they can do it on their own. While not the funniest of episodes, it’s packed with sentiment about living on your own and bonding over the simplicity of your lives.
Favorite Line:
Jack: I’ll get to it when I’m good and ready, so shut your cake hole, Irene!

101. 705 You Light Up My Union

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I like this episode. Maybe it’s because we finally get the first good episode of the 7th season. Or maybe because Feeny teaches his first lesson since forever. Eric and Jack both get a job at the student union, but Eric gives the company’s money away to an organ grinder at the bank. Jack gets furious and convinces Eric to change his ways–which he does–and it’s entertaining. This episode also features Cory and Shawn invading Rachel’s privacy in the apartment–an issue that doesn’t really get resolved and is uncharacteristic of both of them.
Favorite Line:
Jack: Hey, how’d it go at the bank?
Eric: So good!
Jack: Great, give me the deposit slip.
Eric: Don’t actually have one.
Jack: Why?
Eric: Because I didn’t deposit the money.
Jack: Why?
Eric: Because I did something better with it.
Jack: Why?
Eric: Because I gave it to a monkey!

100. 521 Honesty Night

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Cory and Topanga forget to tell Shawn that they’re back together, so they pretend to be broken up again so that he can put them back together for the second time. It’s a silly premise, but holds some nice lessons for those teenagers in love: You don’t have to break up just because you fight. The bright spot? Eric starts his word-a-day calendar and bothers everyone, turning a marginal episode into a memorable one.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Salutations, my didactic friend.

99. 509 How to Succeed in Business

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Shawn gets a promotion during his and Cory’s internship at an ad agency. Cory gets jealous because he always expected that he would be the one to make it in the business world before Shawn does. It’s a reality check for him. Cory comes off as a little whiney throughout the whole ordeal, but it wraps up really nicely between him and Shawn. The best part of the episode is Mrs. Matthews enrolling in Eric’s creative writing class in college.
Favorite Line:
Eric: You can’t do that, Amy.
Mrs. Matthews: Why are you calling me Amy?
Eric: Because that’s your human name.

98. 415 Chick Like Me

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After reading the book, “Black Like Me,” Shawn and Cory decide to dress up like girls so that they can better understand them. The episode gets its point across nicely, although tends to become a bit too polemic. The comedy is top notch, and Cory and Shawn are great. It might be the beginning of Shawn’s sensitive phase.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: I should’ve worn a pantsuit.

97. 510 Last Tango In Philly

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This episode may bother you or not–depending on your stance on the topic. The theme of the episode is “men are idiots.” It’s supposed to be funny that the men aren’t listening to their women, but the women seem to be understanding just as little where their men are coming from. Topanga and Angela want to go dancing, but Cory and Shawn aren’t really feeling it. Little do the guys know that they would get jealous of the handsome coworkers that took their girlfriends out–mostly because their girlfriends didn’t mention it at the time. To me it’s more frustrating than anything. I totally see it from the guys’ point of view. They decided not to go dancing without knowing that the girls would substitute them with other guys–which, by the way, they do on purpose to make their boyfriends jealous. So instead of just deciding to go dancing next time, Cory and Shawn attempt to make the girls jealous back. It backfires, obviously, but it’s totally the response most men would have. The alternative? Perhaps finding a different mate altogether, rather than someone who purposefully makes you jealous and then gets upset when you act upon it. So that may constitute men as being “idiots”, but I much rather be an idiot that mean. While I’m not a fan of the premise, there are some classic lines in this episode and it’s actually very funny–which is why it’s higher on the list than it probably should be.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: I don’t trust anyone with that many zippers on their pants!

96. 720 As Time Goes By

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Maybe I shouldn’t like this episode as much as I do, but it’s better than the other high-concept episodes we’ve gotten this series. It’s much less corny and a nice escape from a less-than-perfect season. Topanga is studying and nagging at Cory about watching too much TV. She then enters into a black-and-white film noir set in the 40s. It’s an interesting concept for an episode, and actually quite enjoyable. Eric is entertaining as the narrating detective of the whole bit, and each character is an alternate version of him or herself.
Favorite Line:
Eric: He had a point. Maybe that’s why he wore a hat.

95. 414 Wheels

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This is an episode I wish I had taken more to heart when I was 16. It’s about rushing to be an adult–as many episodes are. But this one may be a microcosm of what the rest of the show stands for. It’s funny and contains a beautiful message without ever feeling forced. The first half is full of painful awkwardness as Alan has a hard time letting Cory take the car and go on a road trip after he gets his license. But a great last half makes this episode good. Plus, it features a great cameo by Dan Lauria.
Favorite Line:
Judge Lam: It’s a speed trap.

94. 204 Me and Mr. Joad

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Cory and Shawn make a deal with Mr. Turner that if they read “The Grapes of Wrath” they won’t have to take a test on it. However, Mr. Feeny steps in and makes the class take the test anyway, resulting in Cory organizing a walk-out. It’s a funny episode, but the Eric storyline is more frustrating than anything, as we deal with perhaps the most annoying character in the series–his manipulative girlfriend, Desiree. Luckily, this is her 2nd and final episode.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: You can’t do that.
Mr. Feeny: I can do whatever I want–I have the megaphone.

93. 512 Raging Cory

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This is an episode about both Cory and Eric wanting a relationship with their father that the other one has. Amidst a few awkward moments, it’s pretty deep and has some bright spots. It’s the jumping off point you would want for both sons’ relationship with their father–especially Eric’s. However, it’s never built upon in the future and soon everyone starts to treat Eric as a special needs child. Shawn and Jack have a subplot that is great in its own right. Jack temporarily rooms with Shawn and tries to adjust to Shawn’s ridiculous sleeping habits.
Favorite Line:
Eric [on the phone]: Hello, Philly General, have any middle-aged men been admitted this afternoon with basketball injuries? That many, huh?

92. 412 Easy Street

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In this Christmas episode, Cory gets a job working for two old guys in a coffee shop who keep slipping him money to run favors for them. When Shawn informs him that he’s working for the mob, Cory quits. And Shawn takes the now-open job. There’s a pretty interesting and gripping storyline, although not the funniest episode in the series. But Buddy Hackett and Soupy Sales have great cameos.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: You’re working for the mob.
Cory: But the nice mob.
Shawn: Yeah, yeah, the nice mob.

91. 220 Pop Quiz

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A lot happens in this episode without quite actually happening. It’s funny, but just not all that significant. Cory and Shawn accidentally find out about a pop quiz in Mr. Turner’s class, so they study ahead of time to prepare. Meanwhile, with Harley Keiner off to reform school, Joey and Frankie are in desperate need to be somebody’s lackey. They try to be Eric’s, hilariously dressing up like him and following him around uninvitedly. But they soon discover a new student, Griff, and realize they’re a match made in heaven. As a side note, Cory is beginning his awkward phase.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: They can put a man on the moon, but you still gotta read.

90. 219 Wrong Side of the Tracks

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This episode is slightly shorter on laughs, but has a good message. Shawn doesn’t want to be friends with Cory anymore because they were brought up differently. Shawn feels that he should be hanging around with lowlives just because he lives in a trailerpark. It’s a turning point where Cory and Shawn enter another tier in their friendship.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Jason, I don’t skate…at all.
Jason: Come on, Canadians skate, how hard could it be.

89. 209 Fear Strikes Out

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Cory doesn’t know what to do at a make-out party, so everyone at school makes fun of him. The episode tends to move a little slowly at times, but has some great scenes, highlighting with Frankie Stecchino reading poetry.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Harley, you go to poetry readings??
Harley Keiner: What, you don’t think i’m a sensitive guy? I should slap you around for that.

88. 111 The Father-Son Game

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Here’s a great example of how subtlety can still make a great episode. Cory and Eric feel guilty when they bail on their dad for the annual father-son softball game. Meanwhile, Cory and Topanga have an ongoing debate in class about the importance of tradition and saying the pledge of allegiance–which is by far the more philosophical matter. But luckily, it’s the one they stressed the least, as not every episode has to hyper focus on some paramount theme. This episode has its fair share of classic quotes.
Favorite line: Eric: It’s like “The Gift of the Magi,” except we didn’t get him anything.

87. 218 By Hook or By Crook

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This episode has the writers going totally away from Cory and Shawn for once. The whole episode is pretty much about Eric, as his tutor keeps giving him the answers to the tests because she likes him. There’s a small subplot about Mr. Turner as well. The experiment works for the most part and really begins Eric and Mr. Feeny’s long relationship. It’s short on jokes, showing how important Cory is to the mix. However, it’s well-written and the cast does great with the material they’re given.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: Look, this guy’s my teacher, you take good care of him, okay?
Uncle Mike: Like family.
Shawn: No!

86. 122 I Dream of Feeny

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When Cory wishes Mr. Feeny sick so he won’t have to take a geography test, he fears that his power of will is what landed his teacher in the hospital. He starts seeing Feeny everywhere and dreaming that he died. There are some great moments between Cory and Mr. Feeny. And it’s a solid way to wrap up the first season.
Favorite Line:
New Teacher: Do you have a problem with Beowulf?
Cory: Yeah, my problem is nobody cares. I don’t need this. When am i gonna need this. No one has ever needed this…And on a completely side issue, who names their baby, “Hrothgar”??

85. 305 Hometown Hero

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Cory breaks into the school in the middle of the night and accidentally starts a fire. He then puts it out and pulls the fire alarm. Everyone in town thinks he’s a hero and Cory finally feels like he’s somebody important. While this episode is filled with a couple of holes, it’s still pretty entertaining. Eric is finally becoming a full-fledged idiot and accepting that role.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: Quick! Rub off your DNA!

84. 715 The War, Part 1

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Okay, this is a hard episode to grade fairly. It’s extremely funny, but it’s frustrating in other aspects. The gang has divided up into a civil war: Cory, Topanga, and Shawn versus Rachel, Angela, and Jack (Eric is neutral). The catalyst for the fight is when Shawn parks in Rachel’s RA parking spot. It escalates from there, to the point where Cory, Topanga, and Shawn almost get killed by a bear. But it isn’t considered going “too far” until they plaster in the Union a picture of Rachel covered by a fur blanket. It’s hardly the least covered she’s been in the two seasons she’s been on the show, but somehow it’s more wrong than the others almost being killed by a bear. Nevertheless, Cory, Shawn, and Eric are really funny in this one–and Feeny has some good moments too.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Oh great, the butt!

83. 309 The Last Temptation of Cory

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Cory and Topanga’s relationship is going really well, except that Cory now has “the scent” which makes other girls want him because they know they can’t have him. So a girl at school keeps trying to seduce Cory while Topanga is home sick. Meanwhile, one of my favorite Eric stories happens. He buys an autographed picture of Teddy “Beanbag” Bagwell.
Favorite Line:
Cory: If I’m not here by 9 o’clock then we must be at war!

82. 616 My Baby Valentine

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The new baby Matthews is born, but prior to that, Cory throws his mom a hilariously disastrous baby shower. Also, Eric finds out that Jack and Rachel are in a relationship with each other. There’s a lot of awkwardness in this episode and there are a couple plot holes, but it’s also one of the funniest episodes of the 6th season.
Favorite Line:
Topanga: Sometimes things come up!
Cory: I hate that things come up!

81. 618 Can I Help to Cheer You?

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Eric realizes that he won’t be able to adopt Tommy, so he has to say goodbye when a family from California wants to adopt him. It’s one of the saddest episodes of the series. The jokes mostly come from the Cory storyline where a man offers him one million dollars to marry his daughter.
Favorite Line:
Amy: Oh, Alan, you’re saying you’re going along with this? The kid just pulled a shirt out of his fly!

80. 307 Truth and Consequences

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Cory gets Janitor Bud fired by doing a school news story showing him skipping out early from work. Janitor Bud is one of the most underused characters in the 2nd and 3rd seasons. This one features the classic “Janitor’s Curse” bit and highlights with Eric being researched for his unusual sleep activity.
Favorite Line:
Eric: I’ve been sleeping since I was 5.

79. 617 Resurrection

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With Cory’s new little brother in the hospital, he’s looking for Topanga to help him feel better, but she’s having a hard time finding her old self. Eric moves out of the apartment and Shawn returns home from his road trip self-discovery. Although the episode is about Cory and Topanga, there’s emphasis on the one between Cory and Shawn as well.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Feeny [to Cory]: Who talks like you?!

78. 612 Cutting the Cord

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Alan is dealing with his midlife crisis, while Shawn is dealing with his depression after breaking up with Angela. Eric is brilliant at his mom’s lamaze classes, and Cory and Topanga have a standout karaoke scene. It’s entertaining, but the episode doesn’t really get us anywhere in the series.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Oh look at that! You wobble like a weeble!

77. 320 I Never Sang for My Legal Guardian

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Mr. Turner is finally getting around to filling out Shawn’s adoption papers, but Shawn is offended that it’s taken him so long. Shawn spends much of the episode being a whiney and spoiled brat. In fact, everyone’s performances seem kinda off in this one. But it’s an important episode, nonetheless, as Chet Hunter returns and Shawn finally moves out of Turner’s place. It’s a bittersweet end because we love the Shawn/Turner friendship, but at least his dad is back. However, we’d gladly take the former, since we hardly see both Turner and Chet for the remainder of the series anyway, so keeping the one character (Turner) who actually was a mainstay in the 2nd and 3rd seasons would’ve been nice. But sadly the show went in another direction. On a side note, the Eric B-plot is pretty entertaining.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: Good news, Cor.
Cory: Shawn, there’s no such thing as good news before I’ve had my Grape Nuts.

76. 203 Notorious

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When Shawn pulls a prank in the school newspaper, Cory is forced to cover for him. It’s pretty deep and offers a new sincere side to Mr. Feeny. Also, it’s the first episode of Janitor Bud.
Favorite Line:
Desiree [shaking hands with Eric]: Desiree Emilyne Hollinger Beaumont. But you may call me Desiree.
Eric: Eric Matthews. You may call me Desiree.

75. 304 He Said, She Said

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Shawn decides he wants to run away and start life on his own. It’s not quite as eye-opening as it wants to be, due to the fact that it’s only one of the more minor stunts Shawn tries to pull. Everybody shines in this episode and gets pretty balanced screen time. But sadly, it’s also Harley Keiner’s final appearance.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: My dad always talks about the three B’s: Babes, Bucks, and Brewskies.

74. 313 New Friends and Old

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Cory and Shawn become Frankie’s new friends after Joey gets suspended, but they only seem to be interested in making others fear them by association. In an original twist, Shawn is the one who gets a clear head about it all, and they both realize that Frankie is more than just an intimidating giant.
Favorite Line:
Frankie: Mr. Feeny, you told me hanging with a better crowd would make me a better person. And yet, here I wander, like the Israelites in the days of Yul Brynner.

73. 422 Learning to Fly

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Eric takes a tour of Beach State–a party college on a beach–and thinks it’s where he wants to go to school because it’s a sure thing. Cory and Shawn accompany him on his trip and a sorority girl has the hots for Cory. He realizes that Topanga lied to him when she said she wasn’t allowed to go with him on the trip. It’s a great way to wrap up a season, and Eric probably gives Cory his best advice of the series.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Thank you, Mr. Feeny! Thank you for everything!
Mr. Feeny: Well, it’s what I do.

72. 301 My Best Friend’s Girl

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When Cory keeps getting cold feet when trying to ask out Topanga, Shawn decides to ask her out instead. It’s revealed that Shawn planned the whole scheme with Topanga’s best friend, Trini, in order to set up Cory and Topanga. Which doesn’t make a whole lot of sense if you watch it for yourself. This episode is a really good one. And it would be higher on the list if it weren’t for one little thing: Topanga wasn’t in on the set-up. Would she have eventually kissed Cory’s best friend? And even if she had been in on it, it still wouldn’t make sense. I get what this episode is trying to do, but it’s all very upsetting. However, it’s just too funny to put lower on the list. Plus, the end result is what we’ve all been waiting for.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Turner: That’s right, pal, your butt’s in home room before that first bell rings or TV no way, snacks no way, dates no way…okay?
Shawn: Snacks???

71. 119 Kid Gloves

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It becomes more and more obvious with each episode that this series is only just getting started. As the episodes get better and better, the story lines feel more organic and less forced. In this one, Cory loses a necklace that his dad gives him from his days in the Navy. It’s not anything big, but it’s a simple episode of great quality.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Feeny: Can anyone tell me what the acronym, “SCUBA,” is? Mr. Matthews?
Cory: Duba??
Mr. Feeny: Scuba duba. Mr. Matthews, I have obviously failed you on so many levels….Come on. Someone take a stab at it. Mr. Hunter,  you haven’t spoken since the fourth grade. S-C-U-B-A. What does it stand for?
Shawn: Something’s creepy under boat Andy.
Mr. Feeny: Mr. Matthews was closer with “duba”.

70. 613 We’ll Have a Good Time Then

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This episode is depressing. It’s even harder to watch if you know what happens. Shawn’s dad comes back into town, but Shawn is having a problem believing that he’s here to stay. All of his built-up emotions come pouring out. It’s great to finally see Chet after a long absence, but it’s sad that this is his final “true” appearance.
Favorite Line:
Chet: What is she, 6’7″?? Man, she could eat a pie off your head!

69. 112 Once In Love With Amy

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It’s like the writers are trying to tell us that no matter what, Mr. and Mrs. Matthews will always be together. It’s said subtly, but that’s the point. They don’t want us over thinking it. It’s just supposed to be some sort of subconscious notion that we know will always exist in this series. Their marriage is the example for Cory and Topanga in their future together, and it’s first established here. Cory and Eric discover that their mom may be sneaking off every Wednesday night with another man, so the boys do some detective work to figure out what’s going on. As subtext, there’s a math problem Mr. Feeny gives the class that proves this show’s forward-thinking about education back in 1994. It’s also noted that this episode has possibly the strangest credits scene at the end.
Favorite line:
Mr. Feeny: In the course of your education you have been taught to look for the right answer, but you also must know that in life, many times, the right answer is that there isn’t one.

68. 106 Boys II Mensa

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One of my favorite first season episodes. Not just because it surrounds Halloween (I have a soft spot for Halloween-themed sitcom episodes) but because it’s deceptively deep. Cory cheats on the IQ test to gain Mr. Feeny’s respect, but regrets it once he finds out they’re sending him to a special school for geniuses. The ironic thing about it all is that Shawn, who is notably not as bright as Cory, is the brains behind Cory’s schemes throughout the whole episode. While Cory thinks like an average 6th grader, Shawn’s street-smart skill set proves that, in some ways, he may be smarter than we all realize (this gets much more elaborated in future seasons).
Favorite line:
Cory: I called you up to say, “Goodbye.” Or as geniuses say, “Goodbye” in Latin.

67. 503 It’s Not You…It’s Me

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Shawn gets mad at Cory after he realizes that Cory is applying to colleges that Shawn won’t get into. This episode proves that we’re off to a smooth start in this new season, free of the sappier tone of the previous–even during a deeper episode.
Favorite Line:
Eric: You got pictures?
Jack: No.
Eric: Then you got nothin’.

66. 205 The Uninvited

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Cory is faced with a tough decision after he gets invited to a party that Shawn isn’t invited to. Meanwhile, we have the first subplot involving Alan without it having to do with any of the kids. The episode is short on jokes, but we get some great scenes with Harley Keiner and his cohorts.
Favorite Line:
Cory: So you think I’m a geek?
Shawn: Of course not.
Cory: So you think I’m cool?
Shawn: Of course not.

65. 420 Security Guy

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Eric gets fired by his parents at the shop and becomes a security guard. You watch his relationship really reach the next level with his parents, and he’s got some great banter back and forth with Feeny. However, we hope that this season-long struggle of Eric figuring out what to do with his life is soon coming to a close.
Favorite Line:
Cory: What’s this? It’s a list of colleges.
Shawn: Yes, that is where I want you and Topanga to go. Even if I’m not going to school, the three of us should still be together.
Cory: Okay, “University of Italy”…good ol’ U of Its!

64. 118 It’s a Wonderful Night

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This is one of the funniest episodes of the first season. When Mr. Feeny is stuck babysitting Cory, Shawn, and Morgan, Eric is off driving around with his friend, tricking his parents into thinking he has his license. It’s chaotic and nearly farcical. Feeny has some rare moments with Morgan, which are priceless. The classic lines are spread throughout.
Favorite Line:
Jason: I am so proud to be the best friend of the first guy in history to fail his driver’s test before it started!
Eric: The DMV guy waved me forward. I pulled up, like, two inches!
Jason: That was not the DMV guy. That was the father of the kid ahead of you.
Eric: How am I supposed to know that? I’m at the DMV. I assume the guy waving me forward is the DMV guy.
Jason: Eric, DMV guys are cops. They don’t usually wave you forward with a can of beer.

63. 520 Starry Night

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This one should probably be higher up on the list because it’s probably the most important episode in the series, but it’s not because some of it is annoying. Topanga goes out with another guy, Ricky, and he kisses her. She realizes that a kiss can, in fact, mean nothing, confirming her feelings for Cory. This guy Ricky is so obnoxious, talking in a constant creepy whisper the whole time, saying overly corny things that no one actually says. And Angela, on the other hand, is also annoying, making it seem like she’s encouraging Topanga to move on, after flirting with Ricky herself. However, all of this is supposed to happen, since Topanga and Cory are finally back together again in the end.
Favorite Line:
Cory: This is just a painting.
Topanga: This is a masterpiece.
Cory: We’re a masterpiece.

62. 614 Getting Hitched

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After being beaten by Eric and Rachel at the Fiancée Game, Cory and Topanga decide to live together for a few days. They learn all sorts of new things about each other. Meanwhile, Shawn and Jack clean out Chet’s trailer following his death, but Jack keeps his feelings bottled up inside for Shawn’s sake. It’s a really funny episode, and part of a fairly decent 6th season run.
Favorite Line:
Cory: What do you think of my silk pajamas, huh? They cost me two thousand dollars!

61. 416 A Long Walk to Pittsburgh (Part 1)

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This is where the show tends to get a little soapy at times. And although it doesn’t quite figure out how to balance emotion with laughs properly here, it doesn’t do a terrible job. It tries to make us laugh, and succeeds at times, but we don’t necessarily want to. This episode is too depressing. Topanga tells Cory that she’s moving to Pittsburgh, and by the end of the episode, she leaves. We also see a nice new side to Eric that we haven’t seen before.
Favorite Line:
Eric: It smells good out here. What is that? Trees?

60. 120 The Play’s the Thing

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Cory quits the school play after getting the lead role of Hamlet and Feeny refuses to modernize it. In the process, he learns about responsibility and that sometimes you must take the hard route and do things you don’t want to do. It’s a lesson ahead of its time, as today’s adolescents are becoming less and less willing to do things if they are difficult.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: If they disobey me like that again, I’m gonna sit on ’em.

59. 117 The Fugitive

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This one sets the tone for Cory and Shawn’s roles for the whole series, establishing Shawn as the rebel and Cory as the good guy. After Shawn blows up a mailbox, he hides in Cory’s bedroom and convinces Cory to cover for him. It’s more than just a sappy lesson learned in the end–it’s real. Cory’s parents start questioning Shawn’s influence, but accept that perhaps Cory’s influence on him is more important. There’s a little silliness in the whole hiding-in-the-bedroom situation, but the 2nd half is the real highlight.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Feeny: Well, I guess the room is empty–what a perfect time to set fire to my desk.

58. 213 Cyrano

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In the ways of Cyrano de Bergerac, Cory and Shawn help Frankie Stecchino get Harley Keiner’s girlfriend to fall for him. It’s one of the few episodes surrounding Harley and his lackeys. The highlight is seeing Eric reacting to Harley and Frankie in his own home.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: I don’t wanna die before I know what “woo” is!

57. 504 Fraternity Row

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Shawn starts auditing college classes and ditching his actual high school classes. The highlight is when Eric and Jack start their own fraternity called Magnum Pi. Ted Lange and Bernie Kopell guest star. And Paul Gleason as the school’s dean is perfect.
Favorite Line:
Dean Borak: Ever since Kinkos opened, everybody’s flyer crazy!

56. 615 Road Trip

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Shawn goes on a road trip with Cory to find himself. But Cory soon finds out that Shawn’s not planning on coming back home. It’s a meaningful episode, and Cory is just brilliant. Shawn is still depressed, but he’s acting more mature about it now.
Favorite Line:
Cory: You just wait until Feeny hears about this one!

55. 417 A Long Walk to Pittsburgh (Part 2)

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This episode is about love. More specifically, love at 16. It’s hard when you know something about yourself and everyone around you is telling you that you’re wrong. They try pulling you and your lover apart–telling you that you should see other people. Isn’t that your own decision to make? This episode is very emotional and a great conclusion to Part 1. Eric’s jokes get a little forced at the wrong times, but it doesn’t completely ruin the impact of this episode and what it says about Cory and Topanga’s relationship–a good model for any young couple.
Favorite Line:
Cory: You hung up the phone on Topanga!
Shawn: I hung up on nobody, Cory! The phone has to ring for somebody to be on it.
Cory: Not when you’re in love.
Shawn: Or nuts!

54. 110 Santa’s Little Helper

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This marks a turning point in Cory and Shawn’s relationship and solidifies their series-long friendship. It’s the Christmas episode and Cory finds out that Shawn’s dad just got laid off, so he gives him one of his presents. Shawn gets mad and says that he doesn’t want a hand-out, prompting Cory to figure out how to ensure Shawn has a good Christmas. It has a great balance of earnestness and comedy. It also gives us the first sign of Cory’s disdain for wool.
Favorite line:
Shawn: You have five bucks?!?!
Cory: I’ve been saving up for a month!

53. 410 Turkey Day

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Cory has the idea to bring his family over to Shawn’s for Thanksgiving at the trailer park. Tensions fly as the two different social classes aren’t too fond of each other. It’s a powerful episode without ever getting too corny. There are some great lines to go along with some deliberately and painfully awkward moments.
Favorite Line:
Alan: Son, you won’t realize this ’til you grow up, but being right is not necessarily enough to change the way people feel.

52. 208 Band on the Run

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Cory and Shawn start a band to meet chicks, but there’s one problem: they don’t know how to play any instruments. They get backed into a corner and wind up getting booked to play at the school dance–which is one of the funniest scenes all season. It’s the prime example of the classic Cory and Shawn shenanigans that we all love. There’s a pretty entertaining audition montage as well, and a nice subplot involving the Topanga-Cory relationship.
Favorite Line:
Cory: No matter what happens, no matter how cute the girl is, no matter what she’s wearing, we never ever play a note. And why is that, Shawn??
Shawn: Cuz we don’t know how!

51. 721 Angela’s Ashes

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In Angela’s last episode, her father asks her to move to Europe with him for a year. Unsure of what to do, Shawn confides in Cory, who tells him to make her stay. It’s a well-written episode and says more about Shawn than almost any other. He gives maybe his best performance of the series. It’s a hard ending to watch, but it’s so powerful. It might be the only drama-based episode where the lack of humor doesn’t seem obvious.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Are you nutsy-fakin’?!?!

50. 502 Boy Meets Real World

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Cory is filming a documentary a la Real World for school. It’s about the new roommates, Eric, Shawn and Jack and how they get along. Tensions rise when Shawn and Jack get caught in the midst of a love triangle. There are some great lines and it’s an episode that furthers along the Shawn/Jack brother relationship with some nice moments. And you gotta love Fake Eric. However, much like Eric’s future as a weatherman, Cory’s talents as a filmmaker get forgotten about by the show’s writers.
Favorite Line:
Cory: All through my life, everyone’s always asked me, “What do you want to be when you grow up, young whippersnapper?”
Topanga: Who talks like that??
Cory: Crazy people!

49. 604 Friendly Persuasion

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Angela and Shawn break up, and Cory won’t leave Angela alone because she doesn’t think of him as a friend. Also, Feeny comes out of retirement and takes a class with Eric, Jack, and Rachel. It’s a classic. Plus, we get a new evolution of the Feeny Call.
Favorite Line:
Eric: I have closed that chapter in my life and I’ve opened up a new one. And do you know what I call that chapter, Jack? Chapter five.

48. 108 Teacher’s Bet

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It’s an important episode and a turning point in Cory’s adolescence. Mr. Feeny lets Cory teach social studies for a whole week because of a bet they make. As the classroom gets out of hand, Cory realizes that what he’s teaching is actually of great importance. He learns about prejudice and unfairness in the world, becoming passionate about it. If anyone’s watched the reboot show, Girl Meets World, you will see that Cory, in fact, becomes a teacher as an adult. You can trace those roots back to this very episode, along with everything else Feeny’s inspired throughout the series.
Favorite line:
Mr. Feeny: Hey Dude! Sorry I’m late. I was chillin’ with my homies.

47. 406 Janitor Dad

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Shawn’s dad finally gets a job, but it’s as a janitor at school. Kids are making fun of Shawn, so he has to decide whether or not he wants Mr. Feeny to let his dad go. It’s a nice episode between Shawn and his dad, with a really powerful ending.
Favorite Line:
Chet: Now, Virna, sugar pie honey bunch, don’t you go chewing my leg off over a minor financial fracas. [turns to Shawn and Cory] That’s your new vocabulary word for today, boys: “fracas.”

46. 314 A Kiss is More Than a Kiss

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Cory starts dating around again after he and Topanga break up, and he can’t seem to kiss any other girl. But when he sees Topanga kissing another guy, he gets really hurt. Although it echoes most of the notions pinned to the episode two before it, it’s a really entertaining episode. Meanwhile, Eric thinks he got into Boris College. It’s also the first episode of the new Morgan.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Maybe I’m dreaming. Pinch me…Not on the butt!

45. 402 Hair Today, Goon Tomorrow

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It’s a good episode regarding superficiality and the awkward changes most of us go through in adolescence and our teenage years. Cory is uncomfortable with what he looks like, so Topanga proves to him that looks don’t matter by cutting off her hair. Little does she know that she was fine saying those things when she was comfortable with her appearance–which she no longer is. Meanwhile, Eric has the idea of being a TV detective.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Book ’em, good lookin’.

44. 707 It’s About Time

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Even though this is the episode where Cory and Topanga get married, it’s mostly about Cory and Shawn. Truth be told, their relationship history is perhaps even more compelling than Cory and Topanga’s. The story in this one revolves around how Cory and Shawn will no longer be best friends after the wedding, and they’re both having a hard time accepting that. It’s a fairly deep issue to cover, and one that’s pretty much unique to this sitcom alone. On top of that, it’s full of some big laughs and it’s the culmination of 6 seasons of build-up between Cory and Topanga.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Come on, give me the job! I’m your brother! We both came out of our daddy’s womb!

43. 411 An Affair to Forget

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Shawn’s new girlfriend tells him that he can’t hang out with Cory anymore, so Cory and Shawn go behind her back to hang out. The highlight of the episode–and perhaps the season–comes from Eric’s attempt at performing a one-man-show. It’s some of his best in the entire series.
Favorite Line:
Eric: 1984. I poo-poo on a bus. Nobody likes me.

42. 302 The Double Lie

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When Shawn thinks Mr. Turner’s out of town, he takes his date back to his apartment–only to find Mr. Turner with his date on the couch. It takes Mr. Turner and Shawn’s relationship to the next level, and we begin Eric’s difficult journey to graduating. Everyone shines in this classic episode.
Favorite Line:
Cory: That’s Veronica Watson, for crying out loud!

41. 403 I Ain’t Gonna Spray Lettuce No More

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Alan quits his job at the grocery store and the whole family stresses about their fate. Eric is also trying to decide whether or not to go back to high school. This is one of the few times in the later seasons where we see an Alan-centered episode.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Dad, you can’t quit! I can’t support this family! I am not a monkey!!

40. 223 Home

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Shawn is overstaying his welcome at the Matthews’ house, so Mr. Turner offers to take him in full-time. Shawn and Turner’s chemistry is ridiculously good, and we can’t wait for what’s to come. This episode shows signs that this series is really starting to have direction.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Ahh, oxygen. Good ol’ H2O.

39. 121 Boy Meets Girl

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Cory goes on his first “date” with Topanga to keep up with Shawn who’s already gone on his first date. If nothing else, this episode really peers into the depth of Topanga and opens up her character, showing how sweet and perfect she is for Cory. It’s an important episode, but on top of that, it’s pretty funny. Not only is it about Cory and Topanga’s relationship, but also Cory and Shawn’s friendship.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Feeny: This film is meant to help you understand the metamorphosis your bodies will soon be going through.
Cory: How?! That movie’s a hundred years old. The telegram boy was played by George Burns!

38. 508 Chasing Angela (Part 2)

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Wrapping up the purse scenario, Shawn professes his love for Angela. She’s unsure if she’s ready for the commitment at first, but Cory and Topanga make both of them realize that they want a serious relationship, too. Cory and Topanga’s ridiculous argument is the highlight of the whole episode.
Favorite Line:
Topanga: That’s it! That’s it! I have had it! I don’t want to put the Sweet’N Low in my purse!

37. 523 Things Change

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Cory is having a crisis because everything in his life is changing. He finally realizes that he has no control over the world, but learns that it’s how he deals with the changes that’s most important. It’s an important episode for the transition into the college seasons. Although, the saddest part is seeing Chubbie’s go away forever.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Duckies rule!!!!

36. 321 The Happiest Show on Earth

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Okay, so this episode might grate on some people, and if it wasn’t set on location it would be much farther down the list. Cory chases Topanga all the way to Disney World to tell her that he still loves her. Topanga is frustratingly callous towards Cory, turning an easy fix into a multiple day ordeal. But at least she admits to being wrong in the end. It’s one of the best Disney World episodes in ’90s sitcom history, and an eminent one as far as this series goes, as Cory and Topanga finally get back together. A highlight is Eric covering for Cory by carrying around a life-sized doll that looks just like him. Also, there’s an awesome Step By Step crossover, for those who have seen the episode from that series.
Favorite Line:
Dana: What’s a Topanga?

35. 601 His Answer, Part 1

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Cory and Topanga run away to get married after their family and friends tell them it’s a bad idea. It’s a good episode to start the season with. Eric is growing into his new level of stupid. Also, we’re introduced to Eric and Jack’s new roommate, Rachel.
Favorite Line:
Judge: This must be the bride with the nutty name.
Topanga: Topanga.
Judge: Topanga. That’s silly. This is my wife, Bafoofta.

34. 214 I Am Not A Crook

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Cory runs for class president and makes outlandish promises to his classmates. A rift is caused between him and Shawn–his campaign manager. It’s a deceptively powerful episode and shows our society’s unwillingness to forgive mistakes, expecting all candidates to be idol-worthy. It speaks of how campaigns are all about name calling and finger pointing. At one point Feeny talks to Mr. Turner about aspiring for the younger generation to do better. This was 1995.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: I should’ve been more sensitive to our female brothers.

33. 207 Wake Up Little Cory

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It’s the biggest issue the show’s covered so far. Cory and Topanga fall asleep at school while working on a school project and everyone thinks they slept together. It’s a strong concept for 7th graders to face, but yet, it’s an unfortunate reality of adolescence. And if Cory were older, he wouldn’t be so stupid as to fuel these rumors in the first place. But ultimately he makes the right decision, and this goes down as an important episode. Also, it just may be Topanga’s best episode.
Favorite Line:
Joey the Rat: Hey hey hey, Matthews, what the heck ya doin’ here?
Cory: Oh, we’re makin’ a documentary. it’s about what everybody thinks about love and stuff
Joey the Rat: Yeah, that’s cool, what’s it about??

32. 501 Brothers

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Cory’s senior year begins and he thinks he has his room all to himself, but Eric informs him that he’s moving back home. It’s a great way to kick off a new, more mature phase of the show. We get introduced to Jack, Shawn’s half-brother and Eric’s new best friend, and we get a more Friends-inspired opening theme. While the show does make adjustments to try and match its contemporary, it keeps its goofy spirit in the process.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Eric, why are you doing this to me?! Why are you home?!?!
Eric: …I don’t know.

31. 215 Breaking Up Is Really Really Hard to Do

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Cory gets stuck in a clingy relationship with Wendy–who buys him socks and talks about their three future children. He looks at Shawn, who has dated tons of girls, and isn’t sure he’s ready to throw in the towel and commit for the rest of his life just yet. There’s the diner scene where Cory and Shawn are old men, which is one of the classic bits of this series. A great episode.
Favorite Line:
Cory: They want you to take the rolls!

30. 210 Sister Theresa

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With this episode, we can see that we’ve reached a point in the series where we’re moving away from every episode being overly sentimental. Which is a good thing. They don’t always need to be. In this one, Cory’s new girlfriend is Harley Keiner’s sister, TK. He likes her, but she happens to be very clingy. On the other hand, he can’t break up with her for fear of her brother. It further develops the relationship between Cory and Harley. But it’s sad that this is the only episode with TK.
Favorite Line:
Harley: It’s the pressures,you know? The demands of my day. I mean, I’m so busy collecting lunch money and dunking kids’ heads into toilets. I hardly have time for my sister anymore.

29. 717 She’s Having My Baby Back Ribs

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In a season full of below par episodes, this one may be the best. It has the spirit of episodes of yore–and the classic lines, too. Topanga thinks she’s getting fat, so she goes on a diet. But Cory and everyone else think that her strange behavior is because she’s pregnant. It’s a clever story during a time when the writers seem to be running out of ideas.
Favorite Line:
Eric: I’m not fat, I’m pregnant.

28. 421 Cult Fiction

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Woah. This show just got real. Shawn joins a cult and Cory is trying to confront him for the first time about his spiritual beliefs. It’s a really deep episode and it gets intense. There are quite a few solid jokes, but it’s impactful more than anything else. Unfortunately, it’s Mr. Turner’s final appearance of this series.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Which one of you brainwashed nuts validates parking?!

27. 602 Her Answer, Part 2

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A lot happens in this episode. Everyone thinks that Cory and Topanga eloped, when in fact, Topanga gets cold feet and decides she wants to wait. After a blow-up at the “wedding reception,” Amy finally admits that she’s jealous of Topanga. Cory and Topanga have an entertaining argument, and the ending is just amazing as well.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Now, don’t leave me up here in my wedding dress!

26. 318 Life Lessons

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Mr. Feeny has set up a ridiculously hard finals schedule, so some kids begin revolting by vandalizing his house and the school. Feeny contemplates retiring. It marks a real turning point in establishing Mr. Feeny’s importance in the main characters’ lives.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Do you remember back when I was a kid and I ate all that dirt and you were good enough to call poison control?
Mr. Feeny: I wanted my dirt back.

25. 222 Career Day

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We finally meet Shawn’s dad for the first time. One of the best and most underused characters in the entire series. You can’t look away while he’s on screen. Like a fireworks finale, or a car crash. He’s in only a handful of episodes, but his existence affects the entire Shawn story arc innumerably. In this episode, Shawn’s mom leaves town and he gets abandoned at a hotel while his dad goes and searches for her.
Favorite Line:
Chet Hunter: It’s “Corky,” right?
Cory: Yeah.

24. 317 The Pink Flamingo Kid

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This episode features Shawn and Cory’s only physical fight. Cory wants to report Shawn’s brother for stealing computers, but Shawn won’t let him. They get into an uncharacteristic brawl, but the result is a big step forward in their relationship. Meanwhile, almost all of the humor comes from Eric helping Mr. Feeny taking old junk to appraisers. It’s also discovered that Eric calls himself “Kyle”.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Feeny: Mr. Hunter, you don’t have to be blood to be family.

23. 611 Santa’s Little Helpers

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Eric is a mall Santa during Christmas time, and has the idea to buy actual gifts for the kids who sit on his lap. Until one boy asks for his parents back. It’s funny and it’s heartfelt, and Eric is amazing. Meanwhile, Cory tries to get Shawn and Angela back together, which is entertaining in its own right.
Favorite Line:
Amy: Eric, it’s Christmas Eve!
Alan: Hey, we were gonna spend this together as a family.
Eric: I’mmmm Santa!

22. 310 Train of Fools

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You gotta get sentimental about New Year’s Eve. Unfortunately it’s the only episode featuring the holiday in the series, but it’s a good one. After a series of unfortunate events on New Year’s Eve, Cory, Topanga, Shawn, and Eric wind up taking the subway into the city. After the train breaks down, they’re forced to make the best out of their situation. Eric and Cory do some nice bonding in this classic episode.
Favorite Line:
Cory: What is it with you tonight, Topanga?? Did you swallow Sandy Duncan?!?!

21. 519 Eric Hollywood

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Eric gets discovered as an actor and is invited to come to Hollywood to star on an ABC show called “Kid Gets Acquainted With Universe,” which basically parallels the happenings of Boy Meets World. Meta to the max. Everything about it is awesome–including all the actors playing exaggerated versions of themselves. This shows a new side to the cast–one which we will never get to see again. But for 30 minutes, it’s amazing.
Favorite Line:
Eric: I have finally found my niece!
Mr. Matthews: You mean “niche”.
Eric: Probably.

20. 104 Cory’s Alternative Friends

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This is the first episode featuring Topanga. Cory plays a great straight-man to her weirdness. She really rounds out the dynamic of the cast and fills in that missing piece from the first three episodes.
Favorite line:
Cory: You’re gonna be one o those girls who doesn’t shave her legs, aren’t you?
Topanga: I haven’t decided yet.

19. 115 Model Family

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The best thing about this episode is that it doesn’t try to be overly sentimental. In this one, Mr. Feeny teaches Cory and the gang about the difference between a scripted saccharine family, like the Cleavers in Leave It To Beaver, and a real family with real problems. It throws in a few refreshing meta references throughout. The writers also have another go at an Eric-storyline, and actually got the hang of it this time. He gets “discovered” at the mall to be a model. Eric also gets a friend (Jason) and we finally get a change of scenery that isn’t school or home. This episode feels a lot better fit for maybe the 2nd or 3rd season. And Alan proves once again why he’s the season one MVP.
Favorite Line:
Cory: I guess it’s easy to sound smart when you have the best writers in Hollywood writing everything you say.
Mr. Feeny: I wouldn’t know.

18. 513 The Eskimo

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Halfway into the 5th season, the series has seemed to steer away from its strongest episodes–ones taking place in the classroom. Feeny teaching them. It’s leaping too quickly to be something it’s not.
But here, it gets back to what it does best. Feeny finally loses his cool and tells Shawn that he has to come up with tickets to the Super Bowl, or else he gets an F. Cory has to help him and Topanga has to butt-out or else they both fail as well (all these years later, I’m still unsure how Feeny would know if Topanga truly butts-out or not). Shawn thinks going to college is impossible, so Feeny shows him something that’s seemingly even more impossible. It’s really an awesome episode. But we still never find out how Shawn got the tickets.
Favorite Line:
Feeny: Life is a lot tougher than school, my dears.

17. 303 What I Meant To Say

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Cory tells Topanga that he loves her for the first time and she freaks out and breaks up with him. It’s the first of several break ups between the two. It also marks the first of only a few times we ever see Topanga’s childhood home. The episode isn’t about Shawn, but he’s the definite standout. Also, Eli gets hired at John Adams High.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: I’m an idiot savant. You didn’t know that??

16. 312 The Grass is Always Greener

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It’s perhaps one of the most important episodes in the Cory/Topanga saga. They break up for the 2nd time. But it’s why they break up that makes it significant. This is the break-up that precedes each of them dating around and ultimately solidifying their love for one other. Neither of them want it, but it needs to happen. It’s also a really funny episode, chock full of great lines.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Oh, stop being such a wisenheimer…who said that???

15. 517 And Then There Was Shawn

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It’s a classic Halloween episode. An ode to slasher films–especially the ones popular in the mid-to-late ’90s. The gang is in detention and one by one everyone starts getting killed, yet no one knows who’s doing it. It’s an awesome episode–both unique and hilarious. And pretty creepy.
Favorite Line:
Cory: He can’t do that! It’s against the Geneva Detention Convention!

14. 217 On the Air

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It seems like this is the very beginning of Eric’s journey to stupidity. He orders a magazine for every letter of the alphabet because he believes he’ll win $10 million from Robin Leach (long story). Meanwhile, Cory and Shawn start a pirate radio station at school in order to be cool. It’s not terribly preachy, which is the best thing about the 2nd season. It’s also a really funny episode with a lot of farcical moments.
Favorite Line:
Shawn: Don’t…move…maybe…he doesn’t…see us.

13. 507 I Love You, Donna Karan (Part 1)

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It’s the purse episode. A classic. It’s a great concept for an episode. Shawn finds a lost purse and peruses through it, realizing that he’s in love with its owner–although he doesn’t know who she is. Whoever it is, she’s making him a better person already. It’s a huge step in Shawn’s development and one of the most important episodes in his storyline. It’s also Angela’s first appearance.
Favorite Line:
Jack: Who ya talkin’ to??
Eric: Uhh, Mr. Feeny. The British guy on our couch right there.
Mr. Feeny: I’m from Boston, you boob.

12. 516 Torn Between Two Lovers (Feeling Like a Fool)

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This might be one of the best Eric story lines in the entire series. He becomes a substitute teacher for Feeny’s citizenship class. He acts so ridiculous, yet the outcome is deep. You wish you could have seen more of it. However, it was only a small part amidst the Cory and Topanga drama–which actually made some significant headway here, as Cory goes out with Lauren, only to make it more clear that he doesn’t want to be with anyone else besides Topanga. It’s a weird thought, considering their perfect relationship, but only goes to show that even the most perfect relationships have their issues. Cory gives his best dramatic performance of the series, in a scene that’s so well-written that it almost singlehandedly puts this show in a category of its own. Gives me goosebumps.
Favorite Line:
Rajiv: I’m my country I was a nuclear physicist.
Eric: Yeah, but see, everybody here starts with a clean slate. And as your proctologist I’m gonna show you something.

11. 308 Rave On

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When 3/4 of the Monkees appear in an episode, you know it’s gotta be good. And it’s truly one of the season’s best. It’s not overly corny, but not too silly either. Cory and Eric plan a rave for the same night as their parents’ anniversary, so they decide to have both parties at once.
Favorite Line:
Cory: It’s Reg! Reginald Fairfield!

10. 522 Prom-ises, Prom-ises

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It’s the prom episode and Cory and Topanga are deciding whether or not they want to “go all the way.” Meanwhile, Cory’s parents discover that they’re going to have another baby. Hilarity ensues as his parents are checked into the hotel room right next to Cory and Topanga’s. The episode is really about remembering your prom for what it is, instead of worrying about what’s supposed to happen afterwards. Very funny, and Eric is perfect here.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Eric! Emergency! Listen, I need your credit card! Don’t ask me why! I just need it!
Eric: Okay, okay! Um, but it might be maxed out, I just bought some gum.

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For the sake of sanity, I’m counting this two-parter as one. After all, they aired the same night. So many shows end on awkward notes. But it’s just not in Boy Meets World’s character to do this. Here, the characters actually leave. They go out into the real world. The show is about growing up, and they finally do just that. In the finale, Cory and Topanga are moving to New York for Topanga’s new job. The episode pretty much just consists of them saying goodbye to everyone. Oh yeah, and it’s filled with clips from the entire series. Each character is given their own little tribute. It’s nice to see, but part of me wishes they had done this during the penultimate episode instead. Out of the 45 minute episode, about half of it is a montage. The 2nd “part” is much better than the first. It gets extremely emotional during the final scene–which is perhaps the best of the series. A great farewell, and we don’t get cheated out of a proper goodbye to our characters. We get fulfilling closure.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Feeny: I love you all. Class dismissed.

8. 524 Graduation

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I love everything about this episode. How Minkus resurfaces after 4 seasons, how Shawn gives the valedictorian speech, how Eric crashes Cory’s graduation and sings to Mr. Feeny, and how Topanga proposes to Cory. A few other cool Easter eggs are included as well. It kicks off the final 2 seasons and beautifully wraps up the first 5. 5 great seasons where Cory and gang grow so much. In college, they don’t necessarily grow the same way. It’s these adolescent years that really mold them all into who they become. This show really knows how to write season finales, and this one is proof of that.
Favorite Line:
Topanga: Cory, I know what I want to do with my life.
Cory: Shh, Shawn’s speaking in public. This will never happen again in our lives.

7. 405 Shallow Boy

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Eric befriends a female busker, Corinna, outside of his and his dad’s store. She only plays perky songs that get on everyone’s nerves, but after he dumps her, she becomes a national sensation with her angst-filled Alanis Morissette-type of music. Eric is amazing in his scenes with Corinna and really showcases his comedic talents without ever being overly-stupid. Meanwhile, Cory is also brilliant as he disappoints Topanga with his apparent lack of parenting skills. It’s one of those times where both A and B story lines are equally amazing.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Can I handle that? Yeah, I can handle that…or fail to do so.

6. 413 B & B’s B ‘N’ B

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In this episode, we get the first real look inside Mr. Feeny’s home. Cory and Shawn open up a bed and breakfast in his house after he goes out of town. Hilarity ensues and several new one-off characters are created for this episode. It also unofficially establishes Eric and Feeny’s lifelong friendship, taking them beyond teacher-student. It’s a simple premise, but a lot of fun and very well-written.
Favorite Line:
Mrs. Timmer: We are the Timmers!

5. 202 Pairing Off

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The series of events that takes place in this episode proves that the season premiere wasn’t a fluke. The show is getting good. And this one perfectly represents the charm of the 2nd season. The comedy holds up very well and the subject matter is maturing along with the show–but nothing feels forced. Cory has trouble figuring out how to get a girl to say, “Hi.” He goes to his brother for advice, but it turns out to be very misdirected. This might be the most consistently funny episode of the entire series. Everyone shines. Including Amy, in perhaps her best episode.
Favorite Line:
Mr. Turner: So we find, in Fielding’s novel, the character Tom Jones is absolutely irresistible to women. Isn’t that right, Matthews?
Cory [who’s not paying attention]: Uh, yeah that’s right.
Mr. Turner: What’s right?
Cory: What you just said.
Mr. Turner: What’d I just say?
Cory: You weren’t listening either?
Mr. Turner: Matthews, keep your head facing this way. Shawn, tell your buddy what I was saying.
Shawn: Uh, he was saying, “Matthews, you’re not listenin’.”

4. 201 Back to School

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It’s one of the all-time great episodes. Departing from the hatchling first season and arriving in a new, more mature second season is already a huge upswing. Although much of the unique comedy style carries over, Cory’s world gets much bigger as he enters into high school. He transitions well into his not-so-cute-anymore phase and the show becomes much cooler, with the help of a gang of new and amazing characters–including the crowd favorite, Mr. Turner. And thus begins the more school-focused seasons–where the show hits its peak.
Favorite Line:
Joey the Rat [to Frankie]: Hey, look! It’s the kid from when you was gay!

3. 311 City Slackers

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In one of the best episodes of the series, Cory and Shawn steal the key to Feeny’s cabin in the mountains. There, they learn more about Feeny than they bargained for. It’s a new step forward in Shawn’s relationship with his teacher–territory not yet breached until now. This one has the best of both worlds. It’s funny and sentimental. But the comedic highlight of the episode is the never-ending pool game between Eric and Frankie, where they play for 15 straight hours without sinking a single shot.
Favorite Line:
Girl: You’re cute. Are you a jock?
Eric: I’ve worn them.

2. 404 Fishing For Virna

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This is such a well crafted episode. So much goes on, yet it ties together beautifully. Shawn spots his estranged mother across the highway in a motel room window and commissions Cory to act as his messenger. Meanwhile, Brenda, the lunchroom lady passes away and Cory deals with how to say goodbye, learning to appreciate people before they’re gone. Amidst the ponderosity is the show’s refreshing humor, with jokes that never fall short. I could gush forever about this episode, but it’s a perfect microcosm of what this show is about. With Cory at the epicenter of it all, he keeps the episode glued together with his perfect timing and authentic sincerity. We get to see one of the show’s most beloved, yet underused, characters in Chet Hunter. And we also get some good scenes with Frankie and his brother.
Favorite Line:
Cory: Eight lanes and not one stinkin’ island! I mean, you gotta be Moses to get across that highway!

1. 322 Brother Brother

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It could have been any of these in the top 10, but I’ve discerned that Brother Brother is number 1 on the list. It’s not the funniest (that merit would go to Pairing Off), although it has some amazing moments. But it gives us what we’ve longed for the entire series–bonding between Cory and Eric. Many of us can relate to the angst of having a summer where all our friends have gone away leaving us behind at home. That’s what Cory is facing in this awesome season finale. Topanga and Shawn are leaving for the summer, leaving him alone. But Eric is also leaving–for college–which seems to bother Cory the most, since he feels like he never got to know him all that well. It’s the most important episode in Cory and Eric’s relationship and really the first time their aloofness with one another is addressed. There are some awkward moments between the two of them, but the tension only makes the ending that much sweeter.
Favorite Line:
Eric: Looks like I’m gonna end up with my first choice. That’s North Southwestern San Diego State.
Mr. Feeny: Ah yes, ol’ N.S.W.S.D.S…U.

Season 1 MVP: Alan

Season 2 MVP: Cory/Shawn

Season 3 MVP: Cory/Shawn/Eric

Season 4 MVP: Cory/Eric

Season 5 MVP: Eric

Season 6 MVP: Cory

Season 7 MVP: Eric

So there you have it! Sorry again if I offended anyone by my list. Let me know in the comments what your top 3 or 5 or 10 or 100 episodes are!

I love you all. Class dismissed.

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Also: Top 15 Boy Meets World One-Off Characters

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Ranking Every ‘Even Stevens’ Episode Ever!

Even-Stevens

I’m a huge Even Stevens fan. Perhaps the biggest ever. Growing up I wanted to be Louis Stevens more than anything. I dressed like him, laughed like him, and even talked like him. I would set my clock every evening for when the show came on and would be quoting the episode the next day at school to my classmates’ and teachers’ eye-rolling. To this day, I still watch it almost every night. It makes me happy and keeps my life filled with joy and fun.

And I’m sure I’m with most Even Stevens fans when I say that any episode is a good episode. But much like the Oscars or my children, there are always gonna be some that are better than others.

Although I still watch the show routinely, I suddenly had the idea–or perhaps the urge–to rank each episode one by one. I kept track by viewing the entire series twice through for good measure. I carefully and thoroughly listed each one in comparison to the others. Keeping in mind things like episode premise, hilarity, consistency, and quotability, I’ve compiled the ultimate list you are about to see. (Those of you who actually care, that is).

Sure, it’s gonna be hard for me to remain unbiased, but I will try my best.

If you’re wondering where to go to watch the show, most of the episodes are available on YouTube, albeit with questionable quality, but there nonetheless. The show has also been released on DVD in Canada for you to purchase on Amazon.

So enjoy my rants about how annoying Ren is, and without further ado, I give you my ranking of every Even Stevens episode:

65. Family Picnic (Season 1, Episode 8)

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The Stevens compete in the annual family picnic. Louis isn’t that into it. While the rest of his family–competitive as they are–are completely gung-ho about winning for their 3rd straight year. This one isn’t bad, it’s just somewhat flat. Sure, we have the whole “cheaters never win” theme, but it isn’t as hard-hitting as it could be. Louis is very underutilized. He is his usual quirky self, but this is the episode where he is perhaps the most contained.

64. In Ren We Trust (Season 3, Episode 21)

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If there was ever an episode that typifies the surrealism of season 3, it’s this one. The gang finds a briefcase containing $4000, but Ren decides to report the money to the police instead of keeping it. On her way there, she impulsively decides to buy a $4000 pair of lizard skin pants. Other than that, not a lot happens in this one, as it suffers from the “it was all a dream” trope. There are few jokes, but mostly a lot of running around chasing Ren. Although, like any episode, it has its moments. There’s a solid Beans subplot, along with an seemingly off-the-cuff moment by Louis at the end. But overall, it’s not really the penultimate episode we would hope for.

63. Gutter Queen (Season 2, Episode 2)

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In this one, Louis hires a butler, Chives, who is the nucleus of each highlight in this episode. Unfortunately, he provides a hindrance as well. With him around, Louis morphs into a more selfish version of himself. Not that Lou isn’t always trying to find ways to benefit in life, but here it’s stretching–even for him. Part of the beauty of his dynamic with his family is, although he’s the prankster, he always means well at heart. But Chives makes him put that aside. Of course it adds depth to his character, albeit unintentionally, but it also begins his transition into the Louis of season 3, where he substitutes a lot of his carefree goofiness for a more controlled style of humor. And while it works great in the 3rd season, we don’t really need to see it prematurely. You’d think that this premise would be a perfect setup for an awesome episode, but instead we get the weakest one of the strongest season.

62. Little Mr. Sacktown (Season 3, Episode 6)

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Louis trains Beans to win the Little Mr. Sacktown pageant, but realizes that maybe he’s doing it for himself instead of for Beans. This one’s not so much of a Louis episode as it is a Beans episode. And in the 3rd season, Beans is beginning to waver. He gives us a laugh or two here, but his awkward precociousness starts to fade, turning him into an occult caricature of himself. A highlight is the vaudevillian pageant host and his ventriloquist sidekick.

61. Surf’s Up (Season 3, Episode 20)

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It’s no coincidence that 2 of the final episodes in the series are towards the bottom of this list. Actually, it might be a coincidence now that I think about it. This episode has its moments, but they’re mostly in the first few minutes. It slowly fades after that, and the laughs become more intermittent. Ren and Louis’ stories equally share time in the episode, but Ren’s may be a little more interesting. She meets a nice guy, but thinks he might be a merman (a male mermaid). Meanwhile, Louis is feeling left out when Twitty wants to go surfing without him. It’s a good final moment between Louis and Twitty, but could have been even stronger.

60. All About Yvette (Season 1, Episode 5)

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Episodes like this are what remind us how annoying Ren is in the first season. It also makes us glad we never see very much of Charlotte in other episodes. She’s too much like Ren, when one Ren is usually too much. In this one, Ren gets jealous when Charlotte’s old best friend comes to visit Sacramento. Meanwhile, Louis is trying to convince his mom that he is responsible enough to babysit Twitty’s little brother. Although Louis shines in the few moments we get to see him, this episode is mostly about Ren. It’s the most cloying Even Stevens ever gets, and would probably be at the bottom of my list if Louis wasn’t so solid here.

59. Influenza: The Musical (Season 2, Episode 21)

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Credit the musical episode for what it tries to do. The songs are catchy, but there just isn’t enough of a premise for it to be any higher on the list. Also, the music sort of inhibits Louis from being Louis. But with an impressive 6 original melodies, Influenza can be enjoyed at a different level than the rest of the series. Louis’ “I Always Find a Way” number is by far the best. He has a way of both participating in and mocking the silliness of the whole exhibition. And he gives us the word “phlucus”.

58. My Best Friend’s Girlfriend (Season 3, Episode 3)

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If this episode doesn’t make you want to experience the joys of foam hunk diving, I don’t know what will. But don’t let that bit of fun fool you–this episode just isn’t as goofy as the rest. It’s centered mostly around Louis, but he’s fairly contained. When Twitty gets a girlfriend, Louis feels like he’s been replaced. He spends time training Tom to be his new best friend, which is pretty entertaining in itself. There’s just a sort of silliness missing from this episode.

57. Louis in the Middle (Season 1, Episode 6)

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After Louis saves the life of the most popular guy in school, his own popularity skyrockets. His old friends try to keep him grounded, while his new friends prove to be different than they seem. This one has its fair share of memorable bits, but it’s never laugh-out-loud funny. I like the depth built between Louis and Twitty, but this episode tries to show Louis as unfunny and annoying to the people around him. The Ren story line is small, as she deals with Larry Beale trying to sabotage her attempt to improve the cafeteria food. I’ve always wondered if the writers ever toyed with the idea of a Ren-Beale relationship. There are plenty of times where it could have worked. Also, it’s fortunate that this is the second and final appearance of the ever-so-obnoxious Charlotte.

56. Thin Ice (Season 2, Episode 7)

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It’s another Ren-centered episode where her old neighbor, Nelson Minkler, moves back into town and keeps embarrassing her with his obsessive compulsivity. Louis and Twitty are great, but besides a small subplot of them harassing people with prank phone calls, there isn’t much else.

55. Ren Gate (Season 2, Episode 19)

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Principal Wexler gets fed up with Louis’ antics and decides that maybe giving him more responsibility will serve him better than detention, so he forces him to be a hall monitor. Half of the episode we get normal Louis, but the other half we get strict Louis. He takes his new position very seriously, which rids him of any perverseness. Story-wise, the episode is pretty good. It’s surprisingly grandiose and has some affable features.

54. Hutch Boy (Season 3, Episode 10)

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Starting off slow, this one really picks up about 1/3 of the way in. Louis is getting bullied by Lloyd Offler for unknown reasons–which is perhaps the problem. I understand it’s supposed to be funny that we don’t know why, but we just love Louis so much that it incites more frustration than laughter. And I’ve never really liked how this episode concludes. The “fighting” scene towards the end is my favorite part, as it gives Louis more freedom than he usually gets in the 3rd season.

53. Snow Job (Season 3, Episode 17)

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Louis makes it snow outside of Principal Wexler’s house with hopes that it will cancel school, letting Louis skip his algebra midterm. Meanwhile, Ren has one week to learn how to pole vault. The jokes aren’t necessarily flying, but there are some pretty good quotes. The Louis dance at the very end is in my top 3 favorite moments of season 3. And in a very one-liner-centric season, that quick sequence is well worth the wait. Phyllis Diller has a great cameo as the track and field coach, and so does the always under-appreciated Artie Ryan.

52. A Very Scary Story (Season 2, Episode 13)

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If you’re a fan of the Louis scream, then this is the episode for you. Louis tries to figure out what’s going on after discovering that his friends and classmates have all become brainwashed at school. Although it’s not filled with any flat-out jokes, it’s a really good Halloween episode. The story is solid and so is the creepiness. Also, Louis’ penguin jockey costume is a classic.

51. Where in the World is Pookie Stevens? (Season 3, Episode 2)

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Ruby usually doesn’t get on my nerves too much, but she’s a tad bit annoying in this one. On top of it, Ren is completely obnoxious throughout this whole episode. It just reminds you of how spoiled she is. Here, she accidentally puts her beloved Mr. Pookie stuffed animal into a box for the family garage sale. After it’s sold, she gets upset at Louis, then makes her family go on a manhunt to get it back. I understand that it’s hard to lose your most sentimental possession, but it’s her own selfish fault that it’s gone, yet she goes around blaming her brother. It’s also not very believable that her parents would think she’d want to sell the doll in the first place. If I were her, I would be mad at them, not Louis. But she isn’t, and it’s Louis who ends up fixing the whole thing. That rant aside, Louis’ freakout at the end is the highlight of the whole thing.

50. Take My Sister…Please (Season 1, Episode 3)

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There are perhaps more plot holes in this episode than any other. And Ren’s obnoxiousness may be at an all-time high, but luckily it’s mostly features Louis. When he misses the sign-ups for the talent show, he tries to commandeer Ren’s act. Even though there aren’t a whole lot of memorable moments in this one, there’s a nice scene that Louis and Ren share towards the end. Plus, it features this gem of a line: “Opera is boring. In fact, they would’ve named it boring, but it was already taken by ballet.”

49. Swap.com (Season 1, Episode 1)

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This is the very first officially broadcasted episode. So, as you can imagine, it’s gonna be either hit or miss. And while this episode isn’t a total wash, it’s mostly arid of full-on jokes. Louis has some great subtle moments, but the storyline doesn’t allow for him to get in much of a rhythm–especially amidst the slower moving pace of the first season in general. In this one, Louis has to trick Ren into hanging out with the school nerd, Ernie Morton, for a whole day so that Ernie will give Louis his highly rare collectible trading card. It just comes down to the fact that Louis isn’t in it nearly enough. And when he is, he’s not given a whole lot to do.

48. Beans on the Brain (Season 3, Episode 16)

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Louis blows off Beans in order to hang out with his attractive cousin. But every time Louis goes in to kiss her, his guilt turns her face into Beans’. The few instances of corniness don’t ever last long. Donnie has some bright spots, too, as he fakes an ankle injury after embarrassing himself in a football game. This episode is full of some subtle, yet classic lines, and Louis has some great outbursts, but it’s sprinkled among a lot of saccharine, which prevents it from making it any higher on the list.

47. Get a Job (Season 1, Episode 17)

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In this episode, Louis tries to find work in order to buy a slushy machine. But it’s easier said than done, as he can’t seem to keep a job. My favorite part of this episode is the beginning when Louis tries convincing his dad to buy him the machine by throwing a Father’s Day party even though it’s not Father’s Day. Louis is almost always at his best when he’s scheming. The bad part of this episode is that there are about 2 or 3 montages. I’m not a huge montage fan, as I find it takes time away from actual substance and jokes.

46. Close Encounters of the Beans Kind (Season 3, Episode 8)

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Talk about weird. This episode may be the most unusual one in the series. Louis and Twitty suspect that Beans is an alien, so they do some snooping to find out what’s going on. Unfortunately, it’s not a concept the writers ever build upon in future episodes, and it’s not filled with a ton of laughs either, but you have to commend this one for having a really interesting story–especially one about a character we already know and love.

45. Raiders of the Lost Sausage (Season 3, Episode 7)

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The thing about these high-concept episodes is that the jokes are so well-scripted that it doesn’t give Louis the liberty to be Louis. This one takes notes from Airplane! as it applies that humor to an Indiana Jones-esque story line. Louis discovers the beginnings of a hidden tunnel buried within the walls of his house, and does research to find that there may, in fact, be treasure stashed away behind all the dirt. Like I said, the humor is mostly in the script here, rather than through organic triggers, but it’s is a solid episode, nonetheless.

44. Shutterbugged (Season 2, Episode 2)

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For a Ren-dominant episode, Shutterbugged is pretty good. Ren’s yearbook picture looks terrible when her face swells up after a visit from the dentist. Since Principal Wexler won’t authorize any reshoots, she protests at the cost of being expelled from school. Meanwhile, Louis is bunking with Donnie for two weeks. This episode is filled with classic Louis-isms (“That’s what you get for being a high achiever”) and perhaps the best shaved dog butt face. Which isn’t bad considering there isn’t nearly enough of him in this one.

43. Head Games (Season 2, Episode 8)

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We’ve reached the point in our list where the episodes are getting really good. Notice how it didn’t take long. The first half of the 2nd season is really the sweet spot in this series (along with the last few episodes of season 1). And this one’s just really satisfying. The laughs are never really huge, but they’re consistent. Louis gets into Twitty’s head during his baseball game and it starts affecting his pitching. Louis isn’t doing anything crazy here, but he’s just a wonder to watch on screen–even though the episode’s not strictly about him. It shows how important he is to the show no matter what role he’s in. Even the weakest of these episodes meshes together perfectly.

42. Leavin’ Stevens (Season 3, Episode 22)

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Ah, the series finale. These are usually the episodes that are the most unique from the rest of the series. The tone is different, the characters’ stories are all wrapping up, and whatever needs to be said must be said. However, Leavin’ Stevens doesn’t skip a beat. The jokes are all there. Everyone is their usual self, and we don’t get some ridiculously over-sentimental conclusion that breaks away from the silliness of the rest of the series. Although it does give us a heartfelt sendoff to the Louis-Tawny ordeal–however, not an ending, but a place to begin. Maybe it has to do with the fact that The Even Stevens Movie is still ahead of them, but this final episode stays in line with the spirit of the show.

41. Boy on a Rock (Season 3, Episode 13)

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Louis thinks that Twitty’s ex-girlfriend has the hots for him, and tries to figure out how to handle the predicament. This one has some good moments and some even better one-liners. It’s not non-stop hilarity, but it’s definitely filled with some very underrated material. There’s an odd one-off bit featuring these two old guys who hang out in a deli inside Louis’ head and act as his conscience. It’s pretty amusing, but not necessarily vital to the episode. If anything, it’s more weird that they’ve never been featured before. But the chase sequence towards the end tops it off nicely.

40. Tight End in Traction (Season 2, Episode 20)

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“Hold on my impatient friend, the best is yet to come.” It almost feels like a classic line from an ’80s blockbuster. And while this is the exact opposite of that, it does contain a few laugh-worthy bits. The episode starts off a little slow, building towards some great moments, but it wouldn’t be the episode I’d pin that quote to. After Louis rigs Donnie’s pummel horse with the motor from a mechanical bull, Donnie gets hurt. Unfortunately, he has a meeting with the head coach of his dream college, which won’t go over so well if he’s bedridden. I always feel, when watching this episode, that Louis doesn’t quite get the conclusion he deserves. Although the outcomes of his prank could have been catastrophic, his reasoning behind it is somewhat understandable. But Donnie wins in the end.

39. After Hours (Season 1, Episode 13)

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This is one of the rare instances where Ren and Louis are involved in the story together. And it’s refreshing. When Ren gets detention for the first time ever, she isn’t able to work on her commissioned 75th anniversary display after school. With Louis’ help, they break into the halls at night and try to get past the roving Coach Tugnut. This episode’s cool because we get our only peek inside the detention room where Louis spends much of his time. It’s got some good moments, even though Louis doesn’t do anything over-the-top. I always have a hard time ridding this one of its anonymity, but it’s a solidly reliable episode.

38. Deep Chocolate (Season 1, Episode 12)

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You hate to see Louis and Twitty fight, but even the best of friends have their issues to resolve. The two of them desperately want to win the grand prize at their school’s chocolate bar fundraiser. The jokes taper out towards the end, but it’s still a solid episode.

37. Stevens Genes (Season 1, Episode 2)

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I love watching Louis run, and here we get a whole episode full of it. It’s also the episode where Louis realizes that, in a family full of high-achievers, his strength is his ability to be funny. Even Ren admits it. It takes about 8 minutes for this episode to really gain traction, but it’s good for a few good laughs.

36. Love and Basketball (Season 2, Episode 9)

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In this episode, Donnie is head coach of a youth basketball team. But they don’t win a single game until Louis comes on board as his assistant. Louis gets cocky about it, so Donnie signs the team over to him. This one starts off slow, but gains some pretty good momentum by the halfway point. Louis’ idea of coaching techniques is awe-inspiring. I like Ren’s story here too, as she tries to get her first kiss with Bobby Deaver, but he just keeps giving her high-fives instead.

35. Band on the Roof (Season 3, Episode 5)

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Fitting in perfectly with the high-concept story lines of the 3rd season, the show finally tries to resurrect the whole music group idea and make it an underlying element to the series. But it never really furthers much past this episode, besides the seldom music video outros. And depending where you stand on the whole thing determines whether that was actually good or bad. This episode acts as a “rockumentary” of the Twitty-Stevens Connection–a band made up of most of the show’s main characters. There are a few high points, but I mostly appreciate how the uniqueness of the episode never takes away from the spirit of the series. Not one of the best, but definitely not one of the worst, either.

34. The Thomas Gribalski Affair (Season 2, Episode 18)

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I like these episodes where Louis tries to figure out his relationship with his father. In this one, Louis becomes jealous of Tom when he realizes he’s been spending a lot of time with Mr. Stevens (“Steve Stevens is the real deal”). The highlights from this episode come from all the made-up games that Louis and Twitty play–a concept featured intermittently throughout the series, but focused on here. The laughs, albeit inconsistent, all come from classic bits. You hafta love Tom and Louis’ dynamic, too.

33. Model Principal (Season 3, Episode 19)

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This is one of the darker episodes in the series. When Principal Wexler quits his job in order to pursue a career as a model, Lawrence Junior High becomes out of control under the authority of his replacement. Seeing Ren and Louis working together almost always makes an episode better. Here’s where we really start to see Louis at a new level of maturity and awareness. He’s becoming more calculated with his humor. There’s a below par Donnie and Beans storyline, which feels a bit prosaic and forced. It’s merely an excuse to have them make an appearance, and serves very little purpose. But this episode gives Principal Wexler the homage that he deserves as the series wraps up.

32. Sibling Rivalry (Season 2, Episode 15)

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Louis’ energy is at an all-time high in this episode. He’s on a whole other level, like he had 9 cups of coffee before the show. He and Ren bicker non-stop throughout, which makes for great television. They compete against each other on a “sibling wars” game show, even though it hardly has anything to do with which sibling is better at life. The host is obnoxious, but it’s unclear how intentional that is. And although the momentum slows a bit towards the end, the first 2/3 is rock solid. I like to think that almost each episode has at least one joke that stands out above the rest, but this one has nothing really in particular. Nonetheless, Louis is on his A-game, so everything he does is laugh-worthy.

31. Uncle Chuck (Season 2, Episode 17)

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Some of us are lucky enough to never experience this, but for those of us who do, we know it’s a sad moment in life when you watch your hero die. Not literally, but to realize he or she isn’t the person you had thought they were. You see behind the curtain. Louis’ hero is Uncle Chuck. In a family where everyone else is an overachiever and a go-getter, Uncle Chuck is right there with him. His antics make Louis not feel so alone in this world. We finally see who Louis takes after. But in turn, it hurts his relationship with his own father. This isn’t just a fallen hero episode, but a father-son one. And depth aside, it’s got some great laughs. Louis drives his dad so crazy that his head literally explodes!

30. Easy Way (Season 1, Episode 10)

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This is one of the first episodes where Louis gets to fully take the reins. It’s all Louis, as there is no Ren substory. And you don’t want to take your eyes off of him. When everyone in school has to donate their time to raise money for a local charity, Louis decides to nap in a window for a whole day. The laughs may not be huge, but this episode perfectly showcases the subtle humor of the series with its swift timing. It’s also the first appearance of the ever-so-underused Cynthia Mills. But my biggest complaint–as is common with many season 1 episodes–there are too many montages.

29. Foodzilla (Season 1, Episode 7)

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The first 12 minutes of the episode are top notch. Louis’ goofiness is right where you want it to be. He does a live report for Ren’s school news program, where he plans to interview the lunch lady. Deciding to wing it and storm into the lunch kitchen unannounced causes the lunch lady to get upset at him, but the result is priceless. Highlights all come from the first half of the episode–ending with the lunch lady freakout, which turns into a Louis freakout. After that, we get a version of Louis that we rarely get to see–remorseful Louis.

28. Luscious Lou (Season 1, Episode 16)

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Louis’ dad makes him join the wrestling team, so he trains hard to become the best in his weight class. But when he finds out that his cross-town competition is a girl, he tries getting out of it any way he can. This episode’s great because it features Louis outside of his element. The humor is subtle, but smart. The highlights definitely come from when he first joins the wrestling team. He thinks it’s professional wrestling and treats it accordingly. There are a few montages but they’re all fairly engaging. And the very minor subplot with Donnie is funny in its own right.

27. The King Sloppy (Season 3, Episode 12)

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The 3rd season is known for having solid finales. And this one is no exception. Granted, it’s not as big as its contemporaries, but makes for a memorable scene. Louis and Twitty are trying to finish a oversized burger so they can get their picture on the wall of Tex Nagita’s Burger Bonanza. Seeing that it’s almost impossible, they enlist the help of Mike Hegiman–a made-up wig-wearing version of themselves–so they can switch with each other interchangeably and finish the burger. You can tell that Beans has become slightly stale in the 3rd season. He loses his cute little kid awkwardness, becoming too mature and self-realized, which just attenuates the spirit of his character. But you gotta love Mike Hegiman.

26. Devil Mountain (Season 2, Episode 10)

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This is possibly my favorite Tom episode. He has some amazing lines. When he begins to think that Louis and Twitty are just using him for his pizza oven, he takes it personally and betrays their trust in return. The Ren story is not so bad either, with Mr. Stevens’ help. He finally gets his chance to shine for a whole episode. But as great as he is, you’re still wishing for more Louis. He’s at the top of his game in this one, proving that he can do so without being the center of attention–even in his own storyline. The best part is when he and Twitty turn Tom’s chess match into a raucous sporting event. Classic.

25. Dirty Work (Season 3, Episode 14)

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This is one of my favorite Ren-centered episodes. Bust mostly because it has one of the best Louis subplots. While Ren is realizing that Principal Wexler may just be using her to do his dirty work, Louis starts a club on campus that is an ode to the lumberjack–which is obviously just an excuse for him and his friends to goof off during school. This episode inspired me to start my own club in high school, where I did the same thing. There are some supporting characters that standout–such as Coach Tugnut, who may be at the top of his game here. All around, this just might be the most well-written episode of the 3rd season.

24. Almost Perfect (Season 1, Episode 20)

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It’s hard for me not to rank this episode higher up on the list. I’ve seen it an absurd amount of times and can recite the whole thing almost verbatim. But even though she makes up for it in the end, Ren is obnoxious and her storyline gives off a false sense of importance as she whines and complains about receiving a C in wood shop class. Louis, however, is on his game. After his locker becomes infested with living creatures, he gets assigned an old abandoned janitor’s closet, which he turns into a south-of-the-border-themed man cave. His schemes and antics showcased in this episode play as a microcosm of why I aspired to be just like him in junior high–carefree and creative. Filled with quotables, yet short on actual jokes, this one may be in my top 3 personal favorites. Joe Flaherty makes a solid cameo, and Louis and Ren share a couple of nice moments together.

23. A Weak First Week (Season 1, Episode 21)

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Although this episode premiered at the end of season 1, it’s a reworking of the show’s original pilot. It features Louis on his first day of junior high and shows him trying to acclimate to the pressure of living up to his high-achieving family. Although the laughs are far between, there are some classic lines that I’ve used on many occasion. And Louis kills it with his impeccable delivery. “I haven’t read that far. I’m still on the Table of Contents–it’s good though.” It’s a thoroughly engaging pilot. Plus, it kicks off Louis and Tawny’s relationship.

22. Scrub Day (Season 1, Episode 9)

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This is one of the only episodes where Ren has Louis’ back the whole time. Each year, the 8th graders have a tradition to humiliate the 7th graders on “scrub day”. But this time, Louis gets himself into a position where he’s the only kid in his class to get humiliated. The jokes aren’t flying like crazy, but it’s thoroughly engaging. I’ve always loved how, in the end, Louis wins the battle against his bullies. Donnie’s story is funny, too. He chooses Rocky Balboa for his American history presentation.

21. Hardly Famous (Season 3, Episode 11)

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It’s one of the finest final 5 minutes of any episode. The interpretive dancing sequence with Louis and Twitty ranks up there with the series’ best. When Tawny nails the audition for the new arts academy, Louis is afraid to lose her to another school. We pretty much never see Louis as serious as he is here. It’s almost startling. But that balance is what makes this episode great. It adds so much to the depth of Louis Stevens. It’s a little slow from the get-go, which prevents it from being among the higher ranks on the list. I’d also like to draw attention to Tom, who has a minor subplot where he, too, auditions for the academy.

20. Easy Crier (Season 2, Episode 12)

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Louis befriends Lenny, the new kid, whose size intimidates other students, making people fear Louis in the process. It’s a really funny episode with a few good Louis freak outs. We get a nice taste of that chaos we love so much throughout the series. This is really where the show zeniths, so almost every episode during this time is of the highest quality. But here’s my complaint with this one: Not only does it frustrate me that Louis “loses” in the end, but it never fully makes sense why he loses, either.

19. The Big Splash (Season 3, Episode 15)

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I love the concept for this episode. Louis joins the diving team at school, but just uses it as an excuse to goof off by doing cannonballs instead of actual dives. After a talk with his dad, he struggles with the fact that nobody thinks he takes anything seriously. It’s a notion that I, too, have dealt with at times in my life and can relate to. The finale is superb. Ren gives us one of her best moments, and Tom has some nice lines as well.

18. Movie Madness (Season 1, Episode 18)

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As far as all-time great Louis quotes go, this one’s stacked. Louis makes a movie to enter into an amateur film festival. But when he becomes controlling on set, his cast and crew quit. This time it’s Louis reacting to the chaos around him instead of him being the one who catalyzes it. On the other hand, Ren is annoying, but her story is pretty good–and necessary, as it introduces us to both Bobby Deaver and Ruby.

17. Wombat Wuv (Season 2, Episode 16)

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This episode features the absolute best Ren storyline in the whole series, and it’s only a subplot. She joins the cheerleading squad and gets criticized for her lack of perkiness, so she decides to be overly perky about everything. Louis falls in love with the new cheerleading coach, inspiring him to become the school’s new mascot. The humor is both broad and subtle, and features one of my all-time favorite moments as Louis shouts at Tawny while riding by on his bike (you really hafta see it for yourself).

16. Duck Soup (Season 2, Episode 3)

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Here’s another episode that’s on my own personal list of favorites. After Louis gets attached to a duck he finds in his backyard, he refuses to allow an eccentric gourmet chef to kill it for dinner. It just so happens that the chef is preparing a meal for the Lieutenant Governor so Mrs. Stevens can get a bill passed. There are several lines I used to annoy my parents with on a daily basis back in the day. Louis is on top of his game, and gives us an amazing French chef impression. There’s a lot of ground to cover with only one storyline, but the episode moves so smoothly you hardly notice.

15. Short Story (Season 3, Episode 9)

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It’s one of the most gripping stories of the series and an ingenious concept. Louis discovers he has an evil twin, Loomis Freeman, who keeps pranking everyone in school. But Louis is getting blamed for it all. Meanwhile, Ren dumps some guy just because he’s shorter than she is. The only bad part here is the ending. Ren wins after being a jerk, yet Louis loses for doing nothing bad at all. You never like to see Louis lose, although the scene between Louis and Loomis is one of the all-time best.

14. What’ll Idol Do (Season 1, Episode 4)

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When Louis’ favorite VHS tape goes missing, he sets up a home surveillance system to figure out what’s happened to it. Meanwhile, Ren’s mentor, June Marie, may not be all that she claims to be. Louis is hilarious on a mission to solve the mystery of his lost tape. It proves that even without clearly defined jokes, Louis is just as enjoyable to watch. It’s one of the more slower-paced episodes, but there are no lulls. Each joke and each conclusion is well deserved.

13. Your Toast (Season 3, Episode 4)

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Louis is simply spectacular in this episode. Captivating. Otherworldly. Everything he does is perfected to the point of awe. Watching Louis learn how to play the drums is like watching a thunderstorm from a distance–artistically chaotic. He does everything that would put this episode at the top of this list. The only problem? It’s not his episode. There’s not enough of him. Most of the episode revolves around Ren’s new job at the gourmet toast stand in the food court, working under an overbearing boss, Mr. Squirelli. It’s filled with some insane plot holes and some even worse acting. Ren is the least annoying part about it. But honestly, it’s still oddly engaging.

12. Wild Child (Season 2, Episode 11)

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Mrs. Stevens hires an image consultant to help her with her campaign for secretary of state. Louis takes offense when the consultant makes him dress like a little boy for a news segment. He ends up going ballistic on the reporter, in what has to be the best Louis freakout of the series. Louis is brilliant, and once again, we get to see the always under appreciated Cynthia Mills. The only thing that hurts this episode is the jokes slowing down towards the end. More like, Louis becomes less involved. But the first half is so top notch that it doesn’t matter.

11. Stevens Manor (Season 3, Episode 18)

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There’s nothing better than a scheming Louis. In an attempt to make some extra money while his parents are out of town, Louis turns his house into a bed & breakfast with the help of his friends. This may be the most consistently funny episode of the 3rd season. Even during the breaks in the laughter, there’s something to at least smile about. The humor is found in the Louis-controlled-chaos, with everyone around him just playing puppet to his ridiculousness. And even though Ren can get a little annoying here, it’s not in an anti-Louis kind of way–more of a “trying to match Louis” type of way. This is a solid episode.

10. Battle of the Bands (Season 1, Episode 14)

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This was the first Even Stevens episode I ever watched, so I’ll try not to be biased. But it’s just so hard. Though, it really could’ve been any episode, there’s a reason why I got immediately hooked on this show. It isn’t just Louis who’s good–everyone is at their best. Throw in a bunch of amazing dialogue, and this episode is a classic. Louis gets kicked out of his own band and starts a new one to compete with his former. The chaos is priceless and leads to some of the best moments of the first season. It’s also the most we ever get of Artie Ryan. I truly owe it to this episode.

9. Sadie Hawkins Day (Season 2, Episode 14)

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This episode always makes me laugh so hard. Louis’ comedic timing is at an all-time high at this point in the series. With the Sadie Hawkins dance approaching, Louis acts overly cocky with Tawny, making her not want to ask him to the dance anymore. It’s just one funny thing after another in this episode. Louis’ “bad boy” routine is priceless, and so is his freakout at the end.

8. Starstruck (Season 2, Episode 1)

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It’s the BBMak episode, but I like to think of it as the lucky penny episode. Louis finds a penny on the ground and everything in his life starts going perfectly. What makes it one of the best is that it’s such a fun episode. The scene in the recording studio with BBMak is the highlight because we see Louis acting like his usual ridiculous self, even amongst actual celebrities. But it breaks my heart every time he loses the penny at the end. I think I live vicariously through him too much.

7. Strictly Ballroom (Season 1, Episode 19)

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Watching Louis try to dance is worth the price of admission. I’ve borrowed some of his original moves, myself. But after being invited to a friend’s party, Louis realizes he’s not good at dancing. So he learns the antiquated dance of the rumba. Some of my favorite lines are from this episode. On the other hand, Ren is just absolutely obnoxious and acts like a spoiled brat the whole time. Otherwise, this one would’ve cracked the top 5. However, I can’t let Ren completely ruin an episode where Louis is perfect.

6. Heck of a Hanukkah (Season 1, Episode 15)

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This episode wasn’t shown on TV much back in the day, unless it was December. Maybe it’s that infrequency that made this one so desirable. In the “It’s a Wonderful Life”-type story, Louis sees his family in a world where he never existed. It gives him a chance to show off his straight man chops, but balances it out with some classic goofball Louis, too. Aside from being funny, it’s deep–showing Louis’ importance to his family, even though he’s the black sheep. He taught me that in a world where everyone around you seems good at everything, you have to focus on your own good qualities.

5. The Kiss (Season 3, Episode 1)

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This classic episode kicks off the 3rd season with perfection. Louis and Tawny have their first kiss, taking the relationship to the next level. It’s nice because you never see Louis passionate about anything like he is about Tawny. Meanwhile, Ren writes a boring and vain school play, which she decides to “spice up” by adding a final scene where Tawny has to kiss another boy. This episode is hilarious all the way through and has one heck of a finish. Ren gets her ego checked while Louis gives us one of his best scenes ever. It’s a shame that he and Tawny break up, but it goes down in the most entertaining way possible.

4. Secrets and Spies (Season 1, Episode 11)

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As we move towards the top of our list, you’ll see the episodes become more and more consistent. And the consistency in Secrets and Spies helps give it a spot in the top 5. This is a fun episode and is one of my personal favorites. Louis’ tries to figure out where Ren keeps going after school, and then proceeds to mess with her head once he does. There are a bunch of little side jokes throughout that help add to the perfection of the episode.

3. Quest for Coolness (Season 2, Episode 4)

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Growing up, the quest for coolness is never-ending. We’ll give almost anything to be cool and to fit in, and this episode shows to what extremes. After Louis and Twitty find out they’re the only ones in school who don’t own Quasis–a brand of shoes that are sold out everywhere–they meet up with Scabby, a “rather shady character” who claims he can get them a pair. This episode has everything from comedy to mystery to chase scenes. It has a relatable message and an even better ending. Plus, we love watching Louis and Twitty get into mischief the whole time. It epitomizes what makes this show so great. And it’s Louis and Twitty’s chemistry perfected. This one’s in the top 3 for a good reason.

2. Broadcast Blues (Season 2, Episode 6)

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For the most part, the episodes featuring Beans are lower on the list. Mostly because his cuteness starts to wear off by the 3rd season. But when he’s good, he’s great. In this one, Louis and Twitty trick Ren into thinking Beans is a genius so she’ll have a good story for the junior news anchor competition. It’s also, by far, Donnie’s best storyline, as he tries convincing everyone he’s smart by using tricks he learned from a video tutorial. This whole episode is just wall to wall comedy. It also slightly foreshadows the surrealistic tone of the 3rd season. And of course, there’s Cynthia Mills. The scene between her and Beans is an off-the-charts classic.

1. Secret World of Girls (Season 2, Episode 5)

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It was a long and grueling process (not really), but we finally have our victor. Maybe you Even Stevens diehards out there knew it was going to be this one all along. But can you blame me? It’s been my favorite episode since the day it debuted. Famously marking the first appearance of Beans, it also arguably marks the point in the series where Louis finally gets his confidence and self-assurance. While Ren is throwing a slumber party and demanding everyone out of the house, Louis has the idea to secretly record her and her friends, selling tickets to guys in his class for the viewing party. Sure, I hate seeing Ren get the win in the end after acting like a complete brat the whole time, but everything that happens prior to that is sheer brilliance and fun in every way possible. It’s just a perfectly constructed episode. Even the montage is funny. You secretly wish you had the ability to pull this off this scheme back in junior high. And I know Louis gets caught in the end, but to this day, I still think he can get away with it. It’s just as painful every time.

So that’s it! If you have these episodes available to you, I highly recommend going through and making your own list of favorites. Let me know what they are in the comment section below.

Also, check out my ranking of every Boy Meets World episode ever!

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Quick Movie Review: Cruel Intentions 2 (2000)

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As a direct-to-video prequel to the 1999 original, most will go into watching this film with a lot of doubts. And while it does abandon a lot of the tone from the original to become more of an American Pie type of film, it gives a realistic setup to where we see Sebastian and Kathryn in Cruel Intentions. None of the actors are the same, but they aren’t terrible. In fact, Amy Adams is quite impressive given the poor script. The only problem is that this version of Kathryn is openly evil and not as undercover about it. Robin Dunne, who plays Sebastian, gives us a more likable character, but provides nothing of the same charisma as Ryan Phillippe’s portrayal of the original.

I compare this film to the straight-to-DVD American Pie: Band Camp. It’s entertaining, but not the exact same. It’s more aware of itself as a film, and at times feels like a Dawson’s Creek episode–which it acknowledges once or twice.

Although many may not like the twist ending, I think that it concludes an interesting backstory as to how Sebastian got to be so wicked and conniving in the original film.

Cruel Intentions 2 steals a lot from the original, but also provides some more jokey dialogue and shock value–hence the American Pie type film. The jokes miss a lot of the time and are usually set up very blatantly.

The plot might move a little slow and it may be low budget, but it’s not a complete waste of time if you’re a fan of the original.

Twizard Rating: 59